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  1. #1
    Registered User fernykins's Avatar
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    Default OK someone tell me

    to bud out.......... I am trying to keep my throughts to myself....... My #3 so wants another baby.........They live with me. They have 3 kids already plus pay child surport on another. They live with me because they can't afford to be on their own......... No they don't spend on stupid things they pay all their bills........ They really don't need another kid.........I love my grandchildren but......enough is enough...........ok I had to get it off my chest.....I'll be good
    Fern

  2. #2
    Registered User savvy_sniper's Avatar
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    I don't think you should butt out. It is YOUR business. They live in YOUR house. I would tell them they need to find their own place AND THEN they can have another kid.
    House - Start $127,944 Balance $105,032

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    Registered User frugalfranny's Avatar
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    YEOW!! Three kids....paying for another and they live with you?

    Can you reason with them? Reason meaning.........can they really afford it? Does this come under the WANT OR NEED thing?

    Glad you have MUCH MORE patience than I do..........I would have flipped out. Keep counting to 10..........or 20......or 100........

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    Registered User Karen1's Avatar
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    YOW-ZAAAAaaaaa
    I feel for you big time....what a tough situation!!

    BUT I agree with the other post, NO under YOUR roof. I would say move and THEN move forward wtih a larger family.

    Of course you can't prevent it...LOL---in a way, but voicing your opinion to them would be a start.....or say the old, if you have one more kid out you all go.

    WOW---I don't know...that is sure tough! Hang in there!

  5. #5
    Registered User jamie79's Avatar
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    Wow, I have to ask what are they thinking??/ Maybe you could ask that question as a way of opening the door to a conversation

  6. #6
    Registered User fernykins's Avatar
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    Can't kick them out They have little ones......... Like I said all the bills get paid........ my son is working 2 full time jobs....... They know how I feel. But they are their own boss. I am trying not to get lwt things get me upset........ I have breathing problems and getting upset makes it worse also causes the blood sugar to go haywire........As far as patients I'm trying...lol
    Fern

  7. #7
    Registered User Karen1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fernykins View Post
    Can't kick them out They have little ones......... Like I said all the bills get paid........ my son is working 2 full time jobs....... They know how I feel. But they are their own boss. I am trying not to get lwt things get me upset........ I have breathing problems and getting upset makes it worse also causes the blood sugar to go haywire........As far as patients I'm trying...lol
    Fern

    with working 2 full time jobs, don't they have enough money to move out? It seems like it would be rough in general with little ones, but it seems the paychecks should be good enough to live on.....just wondering, not judging????

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    they can't afford to feed the kids they've got now!
    baby step 2- see blog for actual amounts

    "stop being a victim, you are a perpetrator, taking things without paying for them is stealing, you are not a victim, you are a perpetrator. PAY THE PEOPLE YOU OWE, pray for the people you owe, and make it right. " hard nosed AA person, thumping his big book, addressed to me in AA meeting 7/30/2013

  9. #9
    Registered User Dancing Lotus's Avatar
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    It's been my personal experience that you just can't reason with people who want more babies. I can name a few whom I know who should not have had the ones they have and yet they continue to have more.

    You have voiced your opinion, but have you laid out the law? Have you told them you will not babysit or support this baby?

  10. #10
    Registered User cissylu's Avatar
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    Wow what are they thinking?Are they planning on living with you forever?
    Jeez they need to think that over better. I understand you are trying to
    stay out of it.
    They are there on boss , but they live in your house. I know you don`t want to interfere. But what will the added stress do to your health. Your son needs to be thinking of your feelings also.
    Maybe they will think it over more.
    My heart goes out to you.
    We`re hear for you Fern (((hugs)))

  11. #11
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    i would say to them: the day you get pregnant is the day you move out. sorry but i have no patience with this nonsense.
    baby step 2- see blog for actual amounts

    "stop being a victim, you are a perpetrator, taking things without paying for them is stealing, you are not a victim, you are a perpetrator. PAY THE PEOPLE YOU OWE, pray for the people you owe, and make it right. " hard nosed AA person, thumping his big book, addressed to me in AA meeting 7/30/2013

  12. #12
    Registered User fernykins's Avatar
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    I won't interfer.........my sons wife use to work 50-60 hrs a week now shes not working...... She was laided off...... I did tell them I won't babysit unless shes in school........ Thats different......... All my kids have gotten together and decided I can't live by myself. I am having black out or something so now I get them watchiing me to make sure I'm ok......Scared my sister so now if I don't answer the phone she'll call the plice to do a well check....Can't figure out how to win this one....
    Fern

  13. #13
    Registered User Karen1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fernykins View Post
    I won't interfer.........my sons wife use to work 50-60 hrs a week now shes not working...... She was laided off...... I did tell them I won't babysit unless shes in school........ Thats different......... All my kids have gotten together and decided I can't live by myself. I am having black out or something so now I get them watchiing me to make sure I'm ok......Scared my sister so now if I don't answer the phone she'll call the plice to do a well check....Can't figure out how to win this one....
    Fern

    oh are they there cause you WANT them there....they are living with you to help you?

    then it is a different situation in a way. if they are living with you to help then in a way they should be able to add to the family if they want.......cause if they could move out, but don't because living with you is helping you, then in a way they should have the right to do what they want in general.

    not sure if I got that right or not...LOL-LOL

    you are in a pickle in a way. darned if you and darned if you don't. I know, I been there!

  14. #14
    Registered User Sassyclass's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fernykins View Post
    to bud out.......... I am trying to keep my throughts to myself....... My #3 so wants another baby.........They live with me. They have 3 kids already plus pay child surport on another. They live with me because they can't afford to be on their own......... No they don't spend on stupid things they pay all their bills........ They really don't need another kid.........I love my grandchildren but......enough is enough...........ok I had to get it off my chest.....I'll be good
    Fern
    Hmmmm, "They live with me because they can't afford to be on their own". That pretty much sums it up, they can't afford another baby!!!
    I would not keep my mouth shut, I'd tell them no more kids in your home for health reasons if nothing else.

    Cat

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    Registered User Debbie-cat's Avatar
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    I would sit down and tell them that if they plan on having another child, they have to get their own place first. Tell them you have raised your children and although you love them and your grandchildren very much, this is time for you. It is your time now. Hugs.
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