Is it okay to go through life not having any friends?
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  1. #1
    Registered User frugalandsimple's Avatar
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    Default Is it okay to go through life not having any friends?

    What's your opinion on this?

  2. #2
    Master Dollar Stretcher aka AmyBob AmyMCGS's Avatar
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    No. I think we all need to have connections to other people. Family is great, but I think you need friends that you're not related to, too.

    I work in a nursing home, and I find it very sad when people have no visitors. Sometimes they have simply outlived their family & friends, and sometimes they didn't have that many people in their lives to begin with. Either way, those with more visitors tend to be in better spirits.

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    Registered User frugalandsimple's Avatar
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    I was going to edit my post but it looks like I can't do that so here it goes. I don't have any friends. Even at work too. I just can't bring myself to talk to people. I have a difficult time starting a conversation & keeping it going. I feel like I have nothing to say or don't know what to say or talk about. I've tried getting involved like volunteering but I just felt wierd because I kept to myself, hardly said anything to anyone. I do keep myself busy like at work or with my hobbies. I like to read. I used to watched movies but I cancelled my netflix service. I don't feel depressed or lonely.

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    Registered User kaykwilts's Avatar
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    I guess as long as you are happy that is what counts. I have very few really close friends. I too have difficulities starting conversations but it is something I try to work hard at to overcome.

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    Registered User Neeley's Avatar
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    I am very content in not having any close friends. I have an abrasive personality and do not get along well with many people - even in my family. I know I rub people the wrong way. I go so far as to avoid holidays with my extended family. I enjoy the company of my hubby, my parents and kids and that is about it.
    I have intentionally distanced myself from the couple of close friends I had. I just don't feel like talking to people most times and would rather not bother. I think mindless conversations are a waste of my time. Basically all we would talk about was the weather and gossip about trivial things - who had a boob job, who got botox and lipo, who's sleeping with who, and who is divorcing who etc...
    I think as long as you are happy and content then that is all that matters. I think there are some people who have to have friends and others who do not. Again, as long as you are happy that is all that should matter.
    DD (20)
    DS (17)
    DH (over the hill - the big 4-0)

  6. #6
    Registered User Missy's Avatar
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    i had gone years here in my present city without friends. As it is I don't have many, but i do enjoy the ones i have.
    ~~ Missy ~~

    Planting and raising an urban homestead in the middle of Downtown big city right at the foot of the Rocky Mountains!

    Zone 5 Colorado Springs, CO USA

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    Registered User FrugalMomof3's Avatar
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    I dont hav very many close friends myself either, I have maybe 2 that I can say what I want without them taking judgement or me making them angry at me and vise versa. I prefer to be alone, even sometimes without DH so my thoughts are my own and it's just me.

  8. #8
    Registered User danni's Avatar
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    I have a lot of people I'm friendly with but very few close friends outside my family. My sister and me are only a year apart and have always been best friends, whenever we have needed each other we've been there. I'm a very private and shy person so making friends was never easy for me. I think as long as you are happy it's ok, but if you start feeling that something is missing it's time to make some friends.
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    Registered User suzysaver's Avatar
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    I can understand this, I'm basically the same way. I really don't get together with anyone and chit chat or go shopping or any of that. I too, have a hard time talking to people. I consider myself a very private person and don't find it very easy to let my guard down. Do you ever really try to push yourself to interact with others? Sometimes I try and things just don't come out the way I want and then I feel foolish. I talk to my customers every day and even laugh and giggle about little things from day to day...I do consider some of them friendly..but not friends. I value my time alone, but sometimes I think maybe I'm just selfish. People sometimes misjudge me and think that I'm stuck up or something...I'm just painfully shy.

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    I can say I am one of those people that has a handful of close friend, I can't imagine not having close friends tp talk to.
    I would be sad if I didn't have someone to talk to every day, growing up in a small family I always had close friends who are like family to me.

    If you are happy then you are doing good, some people need other people to talk with and do things with, others are happy alone, if you are happy then you are doing the right thing for you.

    Eileen

  11. #11
    Registered User jenray's Avatar
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    This is a great thread because I am the exact same way and my husband has really been getting me down about it lately. Conversations are an incredible challenge for me and every time we move I make less and less friends. I've been here for eight months now and haven't met a single person. I had a few friends back home that I would keep in contact with, but eventually I stopped calling or avoid phone calls; mainly because I was sick of them only talking about themselves and never asking how I was doing. I am content this way but hubby really tries to make me feel like crap for it. I appreciate knowing I am not the only one that feels this way.

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    Registered User Dancing Lotus's Avatar
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    I dont have many friends. I know one girl but she has been hurtful and mean. I dont enjoy my time with her so I have decided to stop talking to her. My other friend lives in another state so we dont talk much. My entire life I have been very social but since haveign the kids and moving around I have with drawn from people. Im easy to get along with so I dont think its me, I just truely have a hard time meeting someone I like. I have never met anybody I like more than my husband!

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    Personally, I think that if you find one or two people in your life that are true friends than you are really lucky. I would say that in my 50 years, that I could really say I have had only one. Many, many people who are good aquaintances, but only one really true friend! I am happy for that one. We don't see each other everyday or even every week, but when we do see each other it is just the same. Other than that, I met my husband at the age of 16, so we have been best friends for over 30 years. That's REALLY lucky!

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    I'm like Neely and don't really care about being on friendly basis with people.
    I love my Fiance and thats all I need.

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    Registered User claimsgirl66's Avatar
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    I know there is a big difference between being alone, and being lonely.

    I have a handful of good friends, my "girls", mostly I have known them over the years through work. I know I can say just about anything to them and they will not judge. And after a bad week at work, I need a little silliness now and then!! Life is too short to be serious all the time. And we do not always have to agree either.

    When I was younger I made the mistake of trusting the wrong people and unfortunately found some people can be mean and back stabbers. I also have had to "break up" with a couple of friends who were just annoying drama queens who were never really interested in what was going on with me. However, as I have gotten older, I have learned to trust my instincts and cherish my circle of family and friends.

    I definitely need my solitude and my "me" time, so I enjoy living alone. Nothing wrong with that. However, when I am having a rough patch, I have found comfort in being able to get stuff off my chest with "the girls" and I do the same for them. Friendship is a 2 way street.

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