others requesting sewing from you?

toile · 10-01-2008, 08:30 AM

May I get your sewing thoughts please?
Patterns literally make me want to throw my machine away. I'm not kidding!
Then I learned about free tutorials online, You*Can*Make*This.com, and designer fabric.

I am making very simple items but with H*eather B*aily, or A*my Bu*tler Fabric.
I mostly copy Matild*a J*ane clothing for my toddler.

I get request from people to sew things for them.
They offer me patterns and part of the supplies needed.
Also it's unpaid etc..
I sometimes attempt the items but always need to use my own supplies.
Yet again, the confusing patterns take hours and it just a disaster.

The thing is people see my daughters beautiful clothes and they don't realize that You*Can*Make*This is for VERY beginner sewers, but has a great result.

How can I politely turn down favors being asked of me on this?

**Moor** · 10-01-2008, 08:43 AM

Tell them that you don't sew for free. PERIOD!

It takes hours sometimes, to sew something. That is time that you could have been doing something with your family.
If they want you to sew something, look at the pattern, if it is something that you know you can't do, then tell them. If it's something that you can do, then tell them a price. If they don't want to pay, then oh well.

It's all about balance, you have to be able to balance doing for others and doing things for your family.

**Momto2Boyz** · 10-01-2008, 09:30 AM

I agree. Simply explain to them that you don't sew for free. You sew for yourself to save money and if they would like something sewn for them, you would need to agree on compensation first. Then, either they will turn you down or you'll at least get paid for your time!

Maybe you could also exchange your services as gifts. If a friend or family member makes these requests, maybe instead of a Christmas or birthday gift, you could give them a coupon for *free* sewing on one item. I don 't know, just a thought!

Good luck. I get the same thing here. I got suckered into making some wooden pumpkin cut-outs for a neighbor (they provided the wood, but I had to provide the glue, paint, wire, tin accessories and screws), it ended up costing me a bit. And I never even got a thank you. Now, they want me to make some Christmas cut-outs for them. I told them, had they been appreciative of the pumpkins then I would have considered it. They didn't understand what I meant and said they were appreciative. I had to explain to them that thank you would have been in order, and they still didn't get it!

Doing things for others is tough. You need to find a balance, I guess.

**perSue** · 10-01-2008, 10:02 AM

what i've done is simply thank them for their compliments, but with everything else you dont have that much time to sew other clothes.

now if they insist... simply mention that you've been thinking

about going into business for yourself and have found the local prices are 50$ per hour, and that doesnt include cost of materials.

AND, since it's YOUR business... you take the measurements of the person (who the clothes are for), and you do all the stuff YOU need to in order to not have to use a pattern!

simply stating all that... ppl will back down.

but most of the time ppl take the hint well enough on "thank you, but i simply dont have the time...."

Kudos to you for having ppl interested in you making stuff for them tho!

**cheapskate 49** · 10-01-2008, 12:41 PM

Yes this is one of the hazards of being able to sew,knit etc.folk always want you to make things for them,and even if they offer to pay it's always way too little for the amount of time it would take.My standard answers are "you couldn't afford me" or "No but I'll teach you to sew(knit)" I've never had any offers on the teaching even though I would do it.I do the occasional repair job for friends and then we usually do a trade....I hemmed curtains for someone and she gave me a few bars homemade soap.
Take it as a compliment that you do such nice work that folk want your designs.

**Michelle** · 10-01-2008, 01:10 PM

I agree with the previous posters' advice. The hard part for me is saying that sort of stuff to my inlaws.

**Ilovesewing** · 10-01-2008, 05:52 PM

I just tell people 'I'm sorry but my to-do list is already so long I couldn't possibly take on another project'. Which is true. I have tons of things I want to do....for me. Sewing for others is not high on my list....and keep in mind that if you do it once they will expect it again, and again, and again. And usually for free. Stand firm!

**shortstack** · 10-01-2008, 06:19 PM

I'm not good at turning people down either. My best friend is coming over tomorrow for me to alter some curtians for her.

Andrea

**PrairieRose** · 10-01-2008, 07:34 PM

If I were you I'd find someone in your local area that does alterations and takes in sewing for pay. When someone asks say 'I don't really have the time to sew for others, (and I'd add this to make them feel better) and I'm not really very good....takes me forever to finish a project. You'd be disappointed when you got your product. Thanks for asking though, you made my day

' But there is a lady that does that (then give them the name of the person you've found in your area who does that for pay).

**peanut** · 10-02-2008, 05:24 PM

Originally Posted by cheapskate 49

Yes this is one of the hazards of being able to sew,knit etc.folk always want you to make things for them,and even if they offer to pay it's always way too little for the amount of time it would take.My standard answers are "you couldn't afford me" or "No but I'll teach you to sew(knit)" I've never had any offers on the teaching even though I would do it.I do the occasional repair job for friends and then we usually do a trade....I hemmed curtains for someone and she gave me a few bars homemade soap.
Take it as a compliment that you do such nice work that folk want your designs.

I've done this. I actually tried to teach someone to sew, and wished I hadn't. She just really wasn't into it. She wanted someone to make clothes for her for nothing for their time. We stopped the lessons.

I have bartered items for sewing though. Right now I am sewing a blouse for a friend who's been supplying me with garden produce and herbs this summer.

However, I've also been on the end the OP mentioned, of having someone ask me to sew for nothing. I don't like it. But she's my new step-mom, so how do I politely refuse? My dad was pretty ticked she asked me. But it was too late by then. I'd already told her I'd do it. And it really is a small project. So we'll see how long it takes. I track all expenses and time these days. That way I have an idea of how much of my time I'm giving away. At a certain point, it's worth it to go back into the workforce and not have these demands made on me. At least I'd get paid for my time there.

Jean

**Teresa T** · 10-02-2008, 09:06 PM

I had something happen to me similar before also. I am far from an expert sewer but enjoy making what I do for myself or for a gift. I simply told this person I was not comfortable sewing for other people.

You can also tell them you only sew for yourself. Let them know you sew for enjoyment. Also you would stress too much over flaws if sewing for another person.

Actually I think these people have a lot of nerve. A simple "No. I don't do that" can work also. I'm with you on that pattern issue. I find online tutorials or instructions in books much easier to follow.