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The Chief

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462 views 2 replies 3 participants last post by  Pepper 
#1 ·
Three men; a philosopher, a mathematician and a Chief Petty Officer, were
out riding in a bus, coming home from scout summer camp when it crashed into
a tree. Before anyone knows it, the three men found themselves standing
before the Pearly Gates of Heaven, where St. Peter and the Devil were
standing nearby. "Gentlemen", the Devil said, "due to the fact that Heaven
is now overcrowded, St. Peter has agreed to limit the number of people
entering Heaven. If anyone of you can ask me a question which I don't know
or cannot answer, then you're worthy enough to go to Heaven; if not, then
you'll come with me to Hell."

The philosopher then stepped up, "OK, give me the most comprehensive report
on Socrates' teachings." With a snap of his finger, a stack of paper
appeared next to the Devil. The philosopher read it and concluded it was
correct. Then, go to Hell! With another snap of the Devil's finger, the
philosopher disappeared.

The mathematician then asked, "Give me the most complicated crypto formula
you can ever think of that could never be deciphered!" With a snap of his
finger, another stack of paper appeared next to the Devil. The mathematician
read it and reluctantly agreed the code was unbreakable. Then, go to Hell!
with another snap of the Devil's
finger, mathematician disappeared, too.

The Chief Petty Officer then stepped forward and said, "Bring me a chair!"
The Devil brought forward a chair. "Drill 7 holes on the seat." The Devil
did just that. The Chief then sat on the chair and let out a very loud
f*rt. Standing up, he asked, "Which hole did my f*rt come out of?" The
Devil inspected the seat and said, "the third hole from the right." "Wrong,
said the chief, it came out of my a**hole."

And the Chief went to Heaven...
 
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