What do you DO when the kids leave??

**PrairieRose** · 06-08-2009, 09:40 PM

We raised 3 fantastic kids and they've all flown the nest with the last being about 8 years ago. It really takes some emotional re-alignment and soul searching to figure out just who you are, separate from being 'mom'. It's also a really wonderful 2nd honeymoon in so many ways

because most of us started our families very early on in our relationships/marriages. You do find some more time to do hobbies but also a lot of us are 'sandwiched' in the caregiver role with our parents at or about the same time as our children are growing up and moving on. I do a lot less cleaning, cooking, laundry, running around than I used to. My life is a LOT quieter, less harried, more organized. I am much more introspective and centered than I used to be as well. Most of all just understand that this is part of 'the journey of life'. Don't let yourself get caught in a loop of depressive thinking, do something for yourself.

**pink23** · 06-09-2009, 11:16 AM

It's really difficult to plan things when you're planning for your kids. I mean it's great since they're your kids but then it seems you will lose yourself.

**lovemycubbycakes** · 06-11-2009, 03:31 PM

Wow, glad I found this post, I am currently going through this. Our baby goes to college this fall and I am already dreading the day he leaves because I will be so lost! I had my first child one year after I was married, so "prego" soon after marriage. I homeschooled all my children as well so they have been my life and oft times I felt like I cheated my hubby because we never got that time alone when we got married to get to know one another. So I have decided to go back to school, I start classes this fall and he is in a masters of devinity track right now as well so we will be students together and he's really looking forward to the "Nakid" thing LOL I like others have loved every minute of being Mom (I feel I was created for this) but now I am looking forward to being a better wife and all the little surprises wrapped up in each day, we feel like we have already started courting each other again this summer.Its fun and we can't wait for grandchildren some day as well. Life is Good!

**diane78** · 06-15-2009, 02:37 PM

Dh and I had a few years off before the grandkids came along. Now we spend most weekends with the grandies: ages 5, 2 1/2, 20 months, and 6 months. They wear me out, but I love being with them. I want to be a big part of the their lives. I have wonderful memories of my grandparents.

**peanut** · 06-16-2009, 02:16 PM

It's been awhile since I posted to this thread and I just wanted to let everyone know that we really are without kids now. Both of them moved to the other side of the country with their respective men and have jobs and are getting established.

DH and I took this as a fun opportunity to delve more deeply into our interests and spend more time with each other. We are having a lot of fun! DH spent most of the day yesterday on family history. He was in his element! I spent the afternoon giving myself a pedicure while watching daytime TV, and bike riding and walking with DH.

Of course we had errands to do in the morning. And I had friends in for Bible study in the evening. My friends went through some fabric with me giving me ideas of what I could make from it.

DH and I ate light meals all day without anyone complaining!

Really, all in all, an enjoyable relaxing day. To me that's what being an empty nester is all about!