our aging parents....

[larabelle]

Well things are a happening in my world. My dad is currently hospitalized inpatient due to a-fib (he presented with chest pain and shortness of breath). This is the second hospital stay in the past 8 weeks. He is a non compliant diabetic with high blood pressure. He is getting weaker. Mom is in denial.

[frugalfranny]

One thing this thread has showed me is that either they need to move close to family or we need to move close to them.

Having read your post after this one, lara, I can only say that this will depend on YOUR CIRCUMSTANCE.........and if that is what they want. It may not be possible for the moves that you mentioned to happen, depending on lots of circumstances..............so be thinking about Plan B. NOTHING ABOUT ANY PLAN WILL BE EASY.............just remember that!

I was living the closest to my father (of 3 siblings)..........and still was 3 hours away.........and my dad would not have WANTED any of us living with him. He had Alz. and ended up being a mean patient (not everyone is).........and a 'wonderer'-------would go out driving and get lost. Even after mom died and we sort of 'rotated in' one at a time, to stay with him..............HE DIDN'T LIKE IT!!

I still say.............YOU ADJUST TO THEIR WORLD...........as they don't always WANT to join yours............be it about living circumstances.........or Alz. Everything has to be considered.........and sometimes on a day to day basis!! (I ended up going to see him once a month.......and he liked this and he "allowed me" to check up on him, BUT EVEN THEN ONLY TO A POINT!) It was a total relief for me when he went into the home..........and put our family under the dysfunctional column.