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Thread: Short Story

  1. 05-27-2008, 01:55 PM #1
    MirandaK
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    Red face Short Story

    I noticed there were some new threads about creative writing and I thought I'd post a link to one of my short stories.

    It's based off the lyrics to the song 'The Weight' by The Band. I did one chapter for each verse of the song.

    Feel free to check it out. Comments are welcome!!

    The Weight

    I wrote this 2 years ago for my dad as a Christmas gift.
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  2. 05-27-2008, 10:17 PM #2
    forHISglory
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    Miranda K: I am highly impressed. You have a great way with a stream of consciousness, with carefully chosen vocabulary, and with characterization. I like the tightness of content and how it expands on the scripture and the song lyric. The bit about the serpents was a great touch in this expansion. I admire how you allow the setting and the character unfold.

    I don't much care for the profanity, although I understand that it is how your character would think. Just my personal pref!

    Overall, you have a great deal of talent and a keen observant eye. I'd like to read more of your works!
    Spiritual:
    "You are fearfully and wonderfully made." Please... respect life.

    Financial:
    Debt free, hoping to stay that way!


    MY BLOG: glorybug.wordpress.com


    1. Keep on writing.
    2. Get some balance in my life.
    3. Lose weight. Hopefully 5# this year. (9.5 pounds right now! Yay, Me!!)
    4. Continue to be looking for how God wants to use me this year.

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  3. 05-28-2008, 09:19 AM #3
    MirandaK
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    oh wow! Thanks soooo much!!!

    It's my first completed short story but I'm kicking around some other ideas now.

    I appreciate the feedback!
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