if I knew then what i know now...

**Missy** · 09-14-2010, 01:19 AM

can you finish the sentence for me?

Hunny and I have been thinking adoption is in our future. If you could do it all over what information or such would you want ahead of time? What different actions would you take? What are small things would you not sweat?What things did you wish you's paid closer attention to?

**Josephhgoins** · 09-14-2010, 08:41 AM

no kids and no plans for them ever here, but in my recent job hunt I noticed that a lot of companies are now offerering Adoption assistance. Just wanted to let you know that you may want to check with both your and his places of employment. They may be able to help you and offer some advice.

**IntlMom** · 09-14-2010, 10:18 AM

i should have a thought here.... but I don't.

we just jumped in with both feet, and never looked back.
and never regretted it, either.

**Missy** · 09-14-2010, 05:36 PM

Originally Posted by Josephhgoins

no kids and no plans for them ever here, but in my recent job hunt I noticed that a lot of companies are now offerering Adoption assistance. Just wanted to let you know that you may want to check with both your and his places of employment. They may be able to help you and offer some advice.

That's great. I didn't know employers could offer it. But in our case..we are the employer...

**Lorelei** · 09-20-2010, 03:52 PM

If you can, take the classes first, then do a homestudy. You learn a lot in the classes.

**gottadance** · 10-31-2010, 12:59 PM

Jump in ASAP - adoption can take a long time and you'll regret the time you spent sitting and thinking...

**stinkbug** · 10-31-2010, 01:32 PM

My neighbors adopted last year....they were in their 40's. She has since told me they wish they hadn't waited so long. They would have adopted another, but they feel it is too late and they are too tired!!!

Dh and her dh are adopting...baby girl is due in about 3 weeks. they were not on a list long at all....way less than a year. They have custody of his two kids (13 and 10) and dd will be 28, he will be 40. He is actually deployed now, but they didn't want to put if off another year. So...she will be a single parent of 3, including a new baby! It works for them and the birth parents are totally supportive of the situation. But....dd is an exceptionally organized and patient person....this has been her dream, and I have no doubts that she can handle it. Plus her sister lives 1/2 block away and we are within a few minutes.

**modamom** · 01-02-2011, 02:40 AM

I would not have done anything different. My son is 9 years old now.

**Redmocha** · 01-21-2011, 02:12 AM

I probably would've tried for a domestic private adoption and not public/foster care. The foster care system is a mess. But how can I really say I wouldn't do it if I knew I would't get my kids? (boy and girl; sibling group; placed in 2008; adopted separately in 2009 and 2010)

I would've read more books on sensory integration issues, also.