how to keep living like nobody else so you can live like nobody else?
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 21
  1. #1
    Registered User mek42's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Central NY
    Age
    46
    Posts
    867
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    14

    Default how to keep living like nobody else so you can live like nobody else?

    We're about to make a pretty radical change in our lives to get back on the Ramsey path. What do you folks do, how do you stay encouraged, when you hear, "You're crazy" and the like from friends you otherwise respect?

  2. #2
    Registered User stinkbug's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Home of the Blue Turf
    Posts
    1,435
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    22

    Default

    We just did a *crazy* thing. Dh accepted a job at a 30% pay cut. And we are thrilled!!! He was so burned out, and the travel was killing him. He applied for his dream job and was selected. I'm sure lots of people think we are nuts......but we are comfortable with our decision. We live far below our means and only have our mortgage (pay off in 2018). We can always make more money.....you can't make more time!

  3. #3
    Registered User larabelle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    North Texas
    Age
    58
    Posts
    2,280
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    22

    Default

    I think ALL the negative feedback was by far the HARDEST thing to deal with as I was trying to get out of debt as well as saving for my house. I found drawing strength thru prayer to be the most effective method to deal with it. I also started journaling my feelings and progress. I listened to Dave Ramsey daily. I surfed this website daily as well as other frugal sites. I totally stopped discussing my plan with others (besides online). I posted my progress in the house as well as in a day planner which I took with me to work to remind me.
    Blessed and Highly Favored!!!!
    From $78K in debt to debt free and purchased a house and used car with 100% cash...God is sooo Good!!!

    Goals:
    New to me vehicle

  4. Remove Advertisements
    FrugalVillage.com
    Advertisements
     

  5. #4
    Registered User mek42's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Central NY
    Age
    46
    Posts
    867
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    14

    Default

    Well, the nice thing is that most of my coworkers, you know, the people we spend the majority of our waking lives with, they're generally very supportive of a no debt goal. They are a little concerned about the area we're moving too, but it is genuine concern that we might be mis-assessing the neighborhood, not that we're silly to do our plan.

  6. #5
    Registered User mek42's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Central NY
    Age
    46
    Posts
    867
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    14

    Default

    Thank you for reminding me that some people are not working in concert with their spouse, significant other, etc. We do have our disagreements about the journey, but my wife and I do agree that being debt free is one of our primary goals.

  7. #6
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    13,930
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    25
    Rep Power
    88

    Default

    Mostly what other people think doesnt even cross my mind. My Dmom is one of the most annoying people in relation to paying off debt. She has never had a mortgage or been in charge of the bill and dad gave her an allowance before SSI kicked in so not much credence there. She is just one for telling me what I "need". You should have a white blouse,second pair of shoes,nice outfits for events. Well,she doesnt even know the more hardcore stuff I do so i just keep it to myself. You cant save and spend the same dollar though.
    We are w/in $2000. and 1-2 payments of being mortgage free. Not debt free. We need a new furnace and many other smaller repairs so that will be another couple years. But we have overcome a lot to be where we are.

    The most disappointment came when I told my best friend. She immediately got defensive. She is paying for 4 college educations and i am not. But i had hope she would be happy for me. I of course get my support from on here.

  8. #7
    Registered User nodmicks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    6,988
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    45

    Default

    We got that from people when we were paying off our debt and to be honest we just ignored them. We go teased about being cheap etc. We knew we were doing what was right for us. We never really got into our goals with people. Most people just assume we are in debt like they are. That's ok by me. We know we don't owe anyone a cent. Dh recently had a coworker say that he had seen me walking in to goodwill when he was dropping stuff off and how terrible I shopped there. Dh told him maybe if he had shopping habits like mine maybe he would own everything free and clear also like we do. The conversation stopped.

    I think one reason in general people get odd about this stuff is it makes them look at their own habits and they may not like what they see. It is kind of the same with eating super healthy etc. It is normal to look at others in comparison and if we see we are lacking it is often easier to try to drag one down to your level that build your self a level up. A non $ example. I don't eat sugar. As a diabetic I think that is a good thing. At work, parties etc it is pushed on me often. I state simply I dont eat sweets and I hear why it is ok, why I need a little and then the many reasons why they could never give up sweets. My best buddy says flat out that it makes her feel bad about her junk habits when she sees me never partake. Odd but honest. I think the same thing happens with finances. People get defensive about the oddest things. These things also have happened when we were not spending $ the way our peers did.

    I mean this as people in general not necessarily your friends or family. Just an observation. With the worry you may be mis-assessing the neighborhood have you pulled up all the info you can? crime reports, drive by at different days and times etc?

  9. #8
    Registered User NikoSan999's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    9,916
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    59

    Default

    No one really says anything to us. I guess because everyone we know knows what we've been thru and just barely getting by and at best sometimes a LITTLE better than other times. No one comments on one light being on or saying we can't go out to eat etc.
    On the other hand no one knows what I've managed to squirrel away either from a little here or little there. It's not much but it's what we have. I have to admit right now I'm having a battle with myself with a WANT and not a need. It would bring a lot of enjoyment to us and we could do it....it's just that I hate to turn loose of the money.
    I have very few people I talk to about the cheap and/or frugal things I do.
    Bank of America is THE godfather of Hell with Wells Fargo running neck and neck. When the world ends the only things that will be left are cockroaches, Walmart, Wells Fargo and Bank of America. Not necessarily in that order. The order remains to be seen.

    Challenges
    Coupon/Sales Challenge Feb
    $8.00

    Grocery Challenge/Feb
    Goal $250.00
    Total $33.55

    Eat Out No More Feb
    Goal 20
    Accomp/8

    No Spend Challenge/Feb
    Goal 20
    Accomp 4

    Change Jar 2020
    $

    Christmas Fund 2020
    $

  10. #9
    Registered User Contrary Housewife's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Kansas City
    Posts
    9,283
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    75
    Rep Power
    62

    Default

    I mostly did not have any of these issues. We didn't talk about our money with friends or family, at first because we were embarrassed by the amount of debt and the stupid situation we were in, and later because we thought it would embarrass our friends who were still broke.

    If the subject came up I just said things like "yeah, we have a lot of bills, too" or "yeah, we're trying to save" and "you should look at this Dave Ramsey guy, he's got a lot of great tips". And I let it go at that unless they indicated they were on the same page with us.
    Stop trying to organize all of your family’s crap. If organization worked for you, you’d have rocked it by now. It’s time to ditch stuff and de-crapify your world.

    If you're not using the stuff in your home, get rid of it. You're not going to start using it more by shoving it into a closet.

    Use it up, Wear it out,
    Make it do, Or do without. ~unknown

    Because we, the people, have the power to build a better future. KH

  11. #10
    Registered User rosebudget's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Coast of Southern Maine
    Posts
    68
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    10

    Default

    I like some of the others don't talk about money with friends and family. When I have mentioned Dave Ramsey I have been meet with some negative comments. I really like the idea that people don't know we are debt free except our mortgage. I will say I love being able to save money. It really is a new concept. The road to get here was hard but so worth it. Do what is best for you to get out of debt!

  12. #11
    Registered User ARCMOMMY's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Pittsburgh, PA
    Age
    38
    Posts
    439
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    9

    Default

    I have had negative and positive. What I learned from both is to surround yourself with those like minded.

  13. #12
    TDN
    TDN is offline
    Registered User TDN's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    2,087
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    25

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mek42 View Post
    We're about to make a pretty radical change in our lives to get back on the Ramsey path. What do you folks do, how do you stay encouraged, when you hear, "You're crazy" and the like from friends you otherwise respect?
    We just don't talk money with people. We are pretty private about personal things is I guess why? I am not sure but it just doesn't cross our minds to bring it up. I did mention something I read in the tightwad gazette once. I don't even remember what it was but it ( the name tightwad gazette) got a chuckle out of a friend so I never mentioned it again. I know people who also love good will and people who hate it. The people I know who love it get kind of excited when they realize I go there too. Someone said they loved the mirror I have in a bathroom. I told them I got it at good will and they said I love good will and started telling me about their finds. I do think it embarresses alot of people I know though.

  14. #13
    Registered User mek42's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Central NY
    Age
    46
    Posts
    867
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    14

    Default

    Thank you all for your posts. They are helpful.

  15. #14
    Registered User Brat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    midwest, country
    Posts
    1,143
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    20

    Default

    I enjoy seeing how much I can save..I also like the idea that I did it my self...

    My new family don't understand how we can have so much and not spend that much..They know we have set goals for us..They also know that we R debt free even the house..

  16. #15
    Registered User ARCMOMMY's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Pittsburgh, PA
    Age
    38
    Posts
    439
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    9

    Default

    Have you read the tightwad gazette yet?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 42
    Last Post: 07-06-2009, 07:54 PM
  2. Article: Weight Loss: Eat To Live - Not Live To Eat
    By Sara Noel in forum Health Articles
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-23-2008, 03:06 PM
  3. Frugal living - lifestyle change or just cheap living?
    By JohnH in forum Question and Answer
    Replies: 55
    Last Post: 02-03-2008, 10:16 AM
  4. Is natural living 'in vogue' where you live
    By Simple Living Mom in forum Green Living
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 12-04-2007, 10:07 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •