When youíre going through the process of losing weight and getting fitter and healthier, there may be many times when you will eat food which perhaps isnít healthy for you. Or perhaps you overeat or donít exercise. This is quite normal and most people find that they do this. The difference between losing weight and not losing weight is how you handle this. Do you give yourself a hard time mentally and really beat yourself up for doing it, perhaps saying "It was stupid to eat all those chocolates", "Whatís wrong with me Ė canít I even resist some cake?", "Why canít I motivate myself to exercise this week, when everyone else can?" or even "Iím useless at losing weight." Hey - just look at all the abuse youíre heaping on yourself.Would you speak to a friend in the same way? I doubt it. Yet in some ways it seems okay to abuse ourselves.

Iíve heard many people label themselves in a negative way, particularly with regard to losing weight. Labels such as Ďbadí, Ďuselessí, or Ďno willpowerí. A common phrase is whether youíve been Ďgoodí or Ďbadí this week with your eating habits. "Iíve been Ďbadí this week because I ate a Chinese takeaway." I really encourage you to steer clear of using the expression Ďbadí. There may have been many instances during the week when you ate healthily. Yet any diversion from this and you immediately label yourself as Ďbadí. The problem is when you label yourself this way, you tend to get stuck into giving yourself a hard time, rather than finding a way to accept what youíve done and then move on. When you give yourself a hard time, youíre more likely to overeat as a means of dealing with how you feel about yourself. What is this costing you personally? What do you achieve by being hard on yourself? When you understand what you achieve from this, youíll find it easier to find a solution and move on.

Beating yourself up keeps you trapped and the way to permanent weight loss is to keep moving forward. Letís say youíve eaten some extra food and you find yourself caught into giving yourself a hard time. Whatís the way forward? I suggest you create a sign for yourself that says "Stop giving yourself a hard time." This can be a real sign, such as a sticker on your computer screen, in your handbag, or on your kitchen cupboard. Or it can be an imaginary sign in your mind which you create. You can add colour to it, a smiley face, anything which lightens it up. This isnít meant to be another way to beat yourself up. This sign is supposed to be fairly light-hearted with the intention of moving you on from this impasse of giving yourself a hard time. At those times when either youíve eaten extra food , or eaten unhealthily or not exercised and you begin to mentally abuse yourself, call on this sign, either by reading it or visualising it. By referring to this sign during the day, youíre likely to be gentler with yourself. Itís a way of catching yourself, forgiving yourself and then moving on. When you can forgive yourself for what youíve done, youíll find youíll get back to being healthy more quickly.

What will it take before you stop giving yourself a hard time?

Wendy Hearn
Weight Loss Success Coach

Author of "The Top 10 Things That Stop YOU From Losing Weight" http://www.PositiveWeightLoss.com

I work with people who want to lose weight and have a great life. I offer individual and group coaching, via the telephone or email. http://www.WeightLossCoaching.com

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