This is kind of a new start for me and I would like to start here first of i guess most of you know we lost our home, income, car and property all at one time it was a nightmare. ...but I am not back peddling there.. it is the past and done.
I prayed for a simpler life I have it...
Hubby is not abusing pain pills as of now. His meds are working well. His shoulder is hurting.
lots less stuff to take care of.
more me time..
more time to take care of my physical and mental health.
my family is at healthier place.
I am worried for son who is moving to new york. He is transferring to walmart.but he is 26 years old. And I am too poor to help me.
my major goals this summer are:
Get new g lasses. Done
new crib done
new used car. Done
a new mactress and boxspring saving 1000 by labor day.
stockpile. Food and hba. Pet s upplies
car insurance paid for the year
I am starting to get anxiety over how much we need
our home is depressing it needs more work than we can ever afford to put in it. The rugs are tore and I do not know why I have fell face first on the floor..I think the good Lord is watching over me. It is very bad shape the whole house.
I have always been frugal but never had to budget so i am now learning the enelope system. And have savings. Not much but we are finally saving.. trying to get used to intermittent money is dufficult....
but for we have been through I am happy and at peace.
this is my journey I hope to be in my own place next year. I do appreciate my brother but we all need our own space.
Bye for now
06-04-2015, 01:57 PM
sounds like you are trying a fresh start!! Sometimes the hardest things are worth the most. sounds like your future has hope! Thinking of you.
06-04-2015, 04:39 PM
Spent 160 on groceries... 130 was pantry stockpile.. Paige baby shower. 20 was meat. 10 was birthday cookie for my brother.... should have baked a cake... frugal flop.. better luck next time...
this weekend I willn post how I do with the envelope system
06-05-2015, 04:27 PM
Set my envelope system up there is categories we spend money.? Some envelopes. Did not have money... what I have I left I will put I to appropriate catoegories. This week is hair for me cleaning, and food...gas and cigs
100 in sa v ing t o ward new bed.
7 dollars I n savings.
Next week car insurance. The left over cash will be moved over to pets. And savings for Christmas. ....
tomorrow is grocery day
170 budget. 4 omac chicken rice and broccoli, sticky chicken, black bean burgers and a taco pasta....
I have a save 5 dollars on 30.... this will go towards stockpile for winter.
will tell u tomorrow how everything goes
06-06-2015, 05:29 PM
The enelope system worked . I forgot to budget lunch and I stopped at a yard sale picked 180 price o the items total from khols for 10 they are all snow man kitchen items and a snowman.so I got a deal but was not budgeted for... spent 4.50 on baby items.......... and 11 on lunch all not budgeted.
my grocery bill was only 150 so I was 20 under budget.
Wally was out of surf and Cascad... came home witb 50 left to put for surf, Cascade , And Pets Next week
I Would have had cash left for personal use. I went yard saling. Pretty stuff but not I the budget this weeyard sales are my kryptonite.
06-10-2015, 08:02 AM
No cash this week.. hard living on sporadic income. Will have enough to pay car insurance... and not touch savings..
Needs only now
mattress and boxspring.
we will do what we can
06-10-2015, 10:15 AM
Hi there my cyber friend so glad to see you back home with us..
I have a suggestion that might help you save a little bit more money have you ever made your own dishwashing soap and laundry detergent?
I've made my own laundry detergent that literally cost less than $2.00 a year plus I used vinegar for the rinse to save even more money.. I haven't tried making the dishwasher tabs yet so I can't how much the cost is there.. but I'm sure it would also cost pennies compared to store bought.
Like I said just a suggestion for you.
06-10-2015, 08:32 PM
I have made my own washing detergent before. I did not clean my husband work clothes well........ but will post your recipe for it I already use vinegar for most things...?.
Saving for my needs we are saving for one item at a time... this year mattress and box. Next year dining room sunite used, leather sectional small size. So no shampooing.
When Hubs was heavy medication he urinated in his sleep a ND destroyed our bed I can cleaned it but time for new. Already bought waterproof pad.
someone stole our dining roo m suite when we moved thought it was in basement was not. T h ought I gave it away but at last moment changel my mind. The person who stole this off v of me is no longer in our life.
I threw away my brothers living room suite it was nasty and I gave him mine...... will not go back on that.. he sleeps on it he refuses to sleep in his new bed...... he is much cleaner than before.. but still not clean enough.
so I have
my dresser and chest. Nightstand to match
2 China cabinets
1 blanket chest
a bamboo rocking chair
1 cherry coffee table
So I am starting over again
Have to have those things in a home thinking of putting a few things Facebook but I have already lost so much..... Hubby made the blanket chest and it has water mark.... I would like to use the dark cabinet bottom as tv stand. Oh I have a tv.....
I am truly pondering it........
then I worry about my brother he will starve to death if we move. . And I will move for my mental health
06-11-2015, 10:31 AM
Brenda I am using a tablet can't access hugs and thank u.... any hoo hugs and thank u
06-11-2015, 11:47 AM
I f or got to say Hubs could not help it it wa s ov er medication..I cleaned to my best ability but time to buy....
06-11-2015, 01:26 PM
06-16-2015, 11:53 AM
My goal a few years ago was to simplify my life. .... Uhm. We are not into the rat race our life is pretty uncomplicated. Lots less stuff. Going to have to get rid of more. Too much stuff. In boxes all packed away. Have not seen it for almost 2 years. Most b of this is my most important treasures so it will be hard...
06-16-2015, 03:31 PM
If you plan to move in another year or so, could you keep those treasures until then? Having them boxed for a little longer isn't so bad. You could decide once you move if you want truly want to let them go or if you have room for them in your new space. Just a thought...
06-19-2015, 10:01 AM
Hubs said no way I was selling my stuff. He was upset I even mentioned it... a new full size bed may come my way. ....my brother bought him one and will not sleep on it. He sleeps on the sofa and has for years. His room is mommy's and except clothes it has stayed exactly the same.. he said he will never sleep in there...so he is giving it to me...I am giving g him my sectional..
used table and chairs
Money for deposits and u haul....
Very nice of my brother
need 2 sets of full size sheets..... reminder to self
06-21-2015, 01:18 PM
Well we ended up with a full size . I put new sheets it... we are rough on sheets with no air. I think k I will get a couple sets.
hope we don't fall out of it.. the dogs look so sad because it is too high for them to get into.
my tart warmer quit.. have to get a new one. I am very sensitive to smells which is why I wash my floors in bleach everyday.
This house is old and musty the windows haven't been opened in years...
Lots of bad stuff happened here not 1 happy memory in this house..it is sad...I would like to tare it down...
Ferns are pretty, I have 2 pink roses on what I thought was a dead bush.
Next weekend going budget for grill , meat and charcoal. And smores..Paige has been asking for griled chicken and baked potatoes salad and smores.
06-21-2015, 07:10 PM
I think I'd find a way to get those windows open and get some fresh air in the place. My ILs never opened their windows either and it never made any sense to me.
06-21-2015, 07:16 PM
I don't even know if they open..... I know most don' have screens....... my bedroom does. ..uhm I like open windows....
06-21-2015, 07:19 PM
It would be worth looking into, IMO. If it doesn't matter how it looks, you could tack screening to the window frame outside with a staple gun. It would be a lot more pleasant at night if the house could cool down. To me that's a health issue when you don't have AC.
06-21-2015, 08:09 PM
Are they painted shut?
Do you have an aluminum recycling place there? We sell a lot of screens but you would need to measure first. Most places sell stuff for next to absolute nothing.
06-24-2015, 05:43 AM
OM if you can't open the windows be very carefull cleaning with bleach. Bleach is a very strong oxidiser, than when inhaled, will cause breathing problems and burning eyes. (My teacher in college overboiled her pot of bleach and didn't allow us to open the windows.)
As said above, please check if you can open the windows, which would probably be a much healthier solution to the smell.
A more chemical approach to the problem would be to use active coal to absorb the smells rather than mask them. Active coal is not hazardous it is a very porous structure of something charcoal like, that has a high adsorption rate which makes it very good in adsorping about any kind of organic structure, inculding smelly ones. an example of what I mean: Active Coal CTC 70 4 mm Format Coal 1 150Mē G 1 KG | eBay
Sorry, sometimes I let my intern chemistry geek come out ;).
06-24-2015, 07:50 AM
Sd we are on a second story .. my brother who is autistic does not want the windows open... it is sad....we have air conditioning it is only on some times due to being able to afford it.. and my bed room does not have it at all. May get hubby to open window it is awful in here
06-24-2015, 07:55 AM
Nikko I don't know if they are painted shut..aynka, i open the d o or when I use bleach.... I love bleach...
06-24-2015, 02:26 PM
OM, it's a health issue for your brother, too, if he gets too hot. I hope you can convince him it's best to open them.
06-24-2015, 02:42 PM
If you're on the second floor and he's not he'd never know you even opened them.
06-25-2015, 10:34 AM
Little things are killing my budget...the vaccum died awhile back so did the carpet shampooer, sofa is awful
the microwave only heats and does not rotate looks awful. ..about 6 years old..
.the dryer is taking longer to dry...
the bed is full all my sheets are king size...
my tart warmer quit and I am so smell sensitive I keep it going al most all the time. .this house is musty...
the only windownside I can open is my bedroom....
my can opener is about to bite the dust. ...
and finally Paige stole my scale..
My brother wil not help me replace anything..so it is all me..
or fix anything...
just a vent...
06-25-2015, 11:22 AM
Have you asked on Freecycle for any of the things you need? You might be surprised what you could find there.
Do you have a sewing machine? It's easy to alter sheets, just one straight seam on the bottom sheet and a straight hem on the top sheet. Didn't your brother have any sheets?
Get a manual can opener. Cheap and reliable.
Make a list of things you really need and start going to garage sales. Set a dollar amount you can spend each week, stick to the list, and when you've spent your allowance for the week, go home. Eventually you'll be able to replace some of these things.
I searched for Freecycle using the name of your town and got 79 hits at www.freecycle.org. You would have to look and figure out which is closest to you if there's anything.
06-27-2015, 08:30 AM
Didn't know about free cycle here..we are rural area..
I don't sew wish I did......mybrothers sheets were wore out.. 1 put a set on layaway and a scale.
My can opener is manual... need to. Buy 2.. always have a back up one..
I bought tart warmer this house is really musty......
1 ceiling fan is up , my bedroom is much cooler. ... the other one is going up todayand a new light fixture in the kitchen....
This hopefully will make it cheerier, we had bare bulbs.....
My bedroom is the cheerist, room in the house...the lr is cluttered bad.. may try to declutter it.......it might help...
06-27-2015, 10:40 AM
wow, you have been through the mill but it sounds like you've come out the other side with ideas, goals and plans. That's great. I was glad to hear you got your BR window open! Freecycle is great, it's amazing to see people respond when someone posts, "does anyone have.....?"
As for sheets, I'm signed up for Groupon, Living Social and Crowdsavings, it seems between the three, one of them always has discounted sheets, I've seen sets as low as $15. I and some of my friends have tried different ones, they are definitely not the greatest ever but they are fine. One set I have is 2 yrs old, has held up fine. Nomorerack is another site for inexpensive sheets, again, not the greatest but for the price they are pretty darn good.
As a nurse who did home care for a long time, I second the activated charcoal. I don't know how it works but it's amazing. Families will have tried everything, at their wit's end, then they try the charcoal, problem solved. We put an open container under the patient's bed. It lasts a long time.
Do you live near an Ikea? Sometimes you can get new stuff, just as cheap as used, like end tables and nightstands. It's hit and miss on quality but so far out of everything I've gotten from there has held up fine except some cheap dressers but they got a beating in my son's room. We don't have one, I go when I visit my brother in Boston.
keep up the good work!
06-27-2015, 11:12 AM
Bernice , no ikea. I am a pottery barn freak on my pintrest board lots pottery barn hacks.
I have been through it.. but happier now... I may never have what I had matrial procession wise. And that is ok. ... I just want a quiet, sirene, simple apartment...clean...
The only thing I miss about my old life is the income and our laundry room and pantry. If we had 1/3 of that income steady I would be content...
I really miss that laundry room it was huge... a pantry that was huge. Floor to ceiling cabinets for food storage. A walk in closet. Washer and dryer .. and 3 drying racks.... plus my rocking chair....
I almost have everything I asked for when I prayed. My life was dismantled... now putting it back 1 piece at a time.... and I wouldn't change it back. For all the stuff and money.
We are free... he is not using... and our relationships are better with the whole family... God blessed us. ..
07-01-2015, 08:18 AM
Been thinking about what makes me happy... less clutter .less stuff.. I alreadd see a painting that does make me happy any more..it is gone.. going to declutter my bedroom today..
Simplicity is what I crave
07-01-2015, 09:01 AM
Any words of advice on things that you would have done differently? I really sympathize with your story. I can't imagine the pain you have endured emotionally, but the good news is that your husband is clean..and that's what is really important. Material things come and go.
My cousin was arrested recently for a drug-related crime. She lives quite a ways from me and I haven't seen her in years. I was absolutely floored. She is the cousin that resembles me physically. I looked at her and couldn't recognize her.
07-02-2015, 08:58 PM
My husband is an experience person.. concerts, camping, vacations. Races, movies.. I am a home person .. this is were we clashed.I was a frugal spender..but savings he never did understand.. u have to find a way to meet in the middle.
my advice to anyone is to save.. I am starting to save pennies , change, 1 and 5's.. starting small..trying to build an emergency fund..
my income is intermittent, that I run out of stuff and have to spend.
Being a frugal spender is fine but savings is the most important. Stockpile is king..
and if someone starts on this road of drugs try to take over finances. I thought about leaving I really did if he had not quit ....
My life is different. I still think middle class I think that may be Making it harder on me..
I appreciate the little things...
07-05-2015, 09:34 PM
Thinking of my brother... he is autistic.. I will worry about him... he will starve to death..and he misses u when we are gone..don't wanna stay here hope he moves with us.
07-05-2015, 11:21 PM
is your brother eligible for services?
07-06-2015, 09:57 AM
He n won't have them... he gets disability and a 16 dollars in food stamps. . Will not spend 1 dollar on food.he buys pop he is addicted to pop.. he eats 2 to 3 plates full every night. .he will starve when we move v out... I worry about him
He will not let me sign up for services to get this house fixed... he is very set in his ways
07-06-2015, 01:05 PM
Can you call around and see if there are services for him? He seems to be a person who is in need of some assistance for adults with mental health issues who need help with day to day living. Maybe there is someone who could provide counseling for him to help you change his mind about getting some of the work done. Sometimes people do better with new ideas if they hear it from someone outside the family, KWIM?
If he moves with you, won't you still have the same problems when it comes to him allowing work to be done?
It seems a shame if you all have a house that's paid for and could be fixed up, if you can't make changes so you're all okay with staying there and could have a nice place again.
07-06-2015, 01:16 PM
It could be fixed up... he won't have it..can't take change.. next year he is going g on vaction with family. Maybe I can paint a a couple rooms and put new rugs down..
07-06-2015, 01:49 PM
I don't know much about autism. Have you reached out to that community? Maybe others who have a loved one with autism would have some ideas how you could help your brother accept some changes to the house. I bet there's a bulletin board online with people who go through the same things you are. At the least, it might be some support for you. :hugz: