How do I keep Hubby in the know about events?

**imagine** · 04-16-2009, 11:17 AM

Hubby seemed surprised by the fact that there is a open house tonight at daughter's school. We did get the note Monday.

He asked how he was suppose to know. I showed him the monthly calendar on the bulletin and the weekly calendar on the fridge all hand written with everyone's schedule.

He says we need just one place. He had showed me the calendar on the computer a few days ago. I guess that is how he interfaces with schedules at work. So I typed in the rest of April and May's activities it is busy and hard for me to read.

How do help Hubby know what is going on?

There has got to be a better way of keeping the calendar.

Any printables that work or even store bought calendars.

Do we need a color code?

Please help me

**Ceashels** · 04-16-2009, 12:29 PM

LOL, I am "She who keeps the calendar" in this house. Greebo knows that I can usually keep things straight and up to date. I have my work calendar in Outlook Express and I print it in monthly format. I keep it handy and can add things by hand as they come along. If there are a lot of changes, I just reprint after I update the computer. (I also use previously used paper.) And yes, I do highlight/label with color codes for work, social, guests, etc.

Having just one calendar for the man to use will be more helpful to him as he only needs to do ONE thing and that is look at it routinely. For a while I was taping the calendar to the wall in the DR for easy access.

**CrazyCat** · 04-16-2009, 12:29 PM

I keep one calender in the kitchen with all the appointments, practices, games, etc. on. I find it harder to keep up more than one..I also have a planner in my purse I use. However, EVRYONE is in the kitchen at some point, so that's where it's hung.

I think once you decide WHERE to keep that all that in one place, everyone will get used to looking at ONE calender for everything.

**Greebo** · 04-16-2009, 12:38 PM

Originally Posted by Ceashels

LOL, I am "She who keeps the calendar" in this house.

Correction, you are "She who's calendar must be obeyed!"

For a while I was taping the calendar to the wall in the DR for easy access.

Which I never looked at. Why would I read that when I can ask you?

**Contrary Housewife** · 04-16-2009, 12:57 PM

My DH uses a calendar on the computer too. Any time he needs to be involved with something I email him with the details and he adds it to his calendar. I also remind him from time to time, "Don't forget next week is ___ and we have to be there by 6pm so you need to leave work early."

**mommy4ever** · 04-16-2009, 02:07 PM

That's a tough one. We use a calendar. We got one with 2x4 squares to put the info in. Right now it's pretty empty, but from September to March it's crazy busy. This handles the bulk of our schedules, unless we have a tournament, then dh likes a printed one on the fridge. He also prints the girls ringette schedules and keeps them on a bulletin board by his computer. This way he can verify the times on the calendar if needed. It works for us.

Could you email your dh so he can put them on his calendar at work? It might be easier as he is in the habit of checking it.

**pen32** · 04-16-2009, 03:03 PM

...i'm shocked he even looks at the calendar!
my family never had a calendar....we just touched base more about what was going on. we obvioously had dr appts and stuff written down, but no need to clutter a calendar with stuff only one person keeps up on.
if i take the kids to the dr's, why bother putting it on something my husband looks at? too much info means he'll overlook it all. i'd just keep one calendar and write the few things he needs to know about or take part in on it. keep your own jam packed calendar seperate.

**monkeywrangler71** · 04-16-2009, 03:20 PM

I keep my own calendar on the computer, I tell my husband about things he needs to attend and he adds it into his calendar. He tells me about his travel/appointments outside of work hours so I know when to expect him home. We don't share a calendar; he doesn't need to know what I'm cooking for supper or what time the kids go to the dentist, I don't need to know about his endless meetings.

**imagine** · 04-16-2009, 03:38 PM

Originally Posted by monkeywrangler71

I keep my own calendar on the computer, I tell my husband about things he needs to attend and he adds it into his calendar. He tells me about his travel/appointments outside of work hours so I know when to expect him home. We don't share a calendar; he doesn't need to know what I'm cooking for supper or what time the kids go to the dentist, I don't need to know about his endless meetings.

hubby actually requested a to know what I was making for supper. LOL

This way he knows what ingredients for lunch not to touch in the fridge. He can also start dinner if I'm running late. That is on a separate list on the fridge.

He also asked for things like dentist appointment when kids have evening activities. I guess he came home to often to find us out and wondered why

**imagine** · 04-16-2009, 03:41 PM

Originally Posted by mommy4ever

Could you email your dh so he can put them on his calendar at work? It might be easier as he is in the habit of checking it.

I'll have to check on that to see if he can put personal things on his computer calendar

**imagine** · 04-16-2009, 03:43 PM

Originally Posted by Contrary Housewife

My DH uses a calendar on the computer too. Any time he needs to be involved with something I email him with the details and he adds it to his calendar. I also remind him from time to time, "Don't forget next week is ___ and we have to be there by 6pm so you need to leave work early."

I'm thinking the reminder on the computer calander might be a good for reminding him to. So I think I might use that for reaaly important Hubby, don't forget items

**monkeywrangler71** · 04-16-2009, 03:50 PM

LOL my husband would be more likely to come home and find us all in bed for the night than out somewhere. Him working 14+ hours a day really cuts down on how much he needs to know about what goes on here

If you're more comfortable with a paper calendar, use it. Just put it on the fridge and if he comes home and no one is there he can look at it to see what's going on. Perhaps even a message centre is in order - an area with the family calendar, white board for leaving notes, contact list, etc. However, if he is using a computer based calendar for work, I would also email him all the upcoming events that require his active participation so that he can enter them into the calendar that he looks at regularly (unless it's shared with others).

If you are the events coordinator for your family, the main calendar needs to be created and maintained in the format that makes the most sense for you.

**imagine** · 04-16-2009, 03:52 PM

Thanks everyone!

Call me the overachiever.

Hubby came home for lunch to several different styles of handmade calenders. I ask him which one he liked the best.

Basically the same one we had been using. LOL He felt bad and just said he was sorry his week at home and work had been full of "didn't we tell you?" and late notifications of up coming event/meetings etc. (Welcome to Spring Sweet Hubby)

I think I'll clean up the style of the fridge weekly calendar. Like move school start and end times for each child (these vary the day of the week and for each child) to a consolidated spot instead of listing them on the day. I think I'll also add a highlights section of upcoming event later in the month.

I also let Hubby know verbally when the weekly calendar has been up dated for the next week.

I also think next year I'll get a month calendar with bigger squares.

Thanks again everyone!

**zakity** · 04-17-2009, 12:13 AM

We have a white board that has "mon" through "fri" on it and a place for notes. I write the weekly schedule on the board for the next week every Saturday.

I keep a "master" calendar on my computer. I use Outlook. I put everything in it, even reminders to change my contacts. I even use it to plan out our meals.

**imagine** · 04-17-2009, 03:59 AM

Originally Posted by monkeywrangler71

LOL my husband would be more likely to come home and find us all in bed for the night than out somewhere. Him working 14+ hours a day really cuts down on how much he needs to know about what goes on here

If you're more comfortable with a paper calendar, use it. Just put it on the fridge and if he comes home and no one is there he can look at it to see what's going on. Perhaps even a message centre is in order - an area with the family calendar, white board for leaving notes, contact list, etc. However, if he is using a computer based calendar for work, I would also email him all the upcoming events that require his active participation so that he can enter them into the calendar that he looks at regularly (unless it's shared with others).

If you are the events coordinator for your family, the main calendar needs to be created and maintained in the format that makes the most sense for you.

Hubby use to have a job that he did find us asleep more than out. He really thought that the children only had PJ's ( that is a joke) but he did see a picture once and say "that dress looks cute on daughter why doesn't she wear it more often?", it was her favorite dress and she wore it every time it was out of the wash.He also saw a picture of daughter's second birthday and said that He didn't remember it. I told him it was because he wasn't there" Then when work promised him a promotion more business trips (at least two weeks a month) like that was a good thing he changed jobs. We down sized and moved. We cut our income by more than half but Hubby has a job he enjoys and is within walking distance of our house. He walks to work and home for lunch and back to work and back home for dinner. (We even got to walk hand in hand to daughter's school open house last night. We are within walking distance of the children's schools too.) He definitely knows the children have more than PJ's now. Life is Good.

I also think that missing so much of his family's life in the past because of work has caused him to like to know what is going on even if it is just Daughter has a dentist appointment.