Guy I am interested in as a flirter
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  1. #1
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    Default Guy I am interested in as a flirter

    Should I be concerned about this?

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    ?? Is a flirter?
    Is he just flirting or serious about you? ask.

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    Registered User krbshappy71's Avatar
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    Flirters can have a good time flirting until they have a reason to become more serious. It doesn't mean they are a bad person or anything. If it already has your hackles up, though, maybe ask yourself why it causes a stir. Insecurity? Jealousy when it is towards other people instead of you? Only you know if its ok or not.

    Also, what some may read as flirting is really just friendliness. Unless outright innuendos maybe the person is just friendly. Hope that helps.

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    When he's flirting, with you right beside him, HOW DO YOU FEEL? Enuff said.

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    Registered User MomToTwoBoys's Avatar
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    I would turn around and walk the other way. Seriously.

    I know lots of guys that are flirters and they're never, ever without the desire to keep flirting, even after they're with someone else. They may act one way with their significant other, then turn around and act a totally different way with someone else.

    I also know plenty of women that are flirters.

    So yes, I would be concerned. No matter how many times they tell you nothing is going on, they aren't to be trusted.

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    Registered User pollypurebred39's Avatar
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    It would more than bother me, and I wouldn't let it pass. You're either with me, or you're not. Period. If the woman he was flirting with flirted back. I'd probably ask them if they'd like to get a room, then walk away. If he flirted and the woman did not respond in kind, I'd wait till we were alone and let him have it. Nope, could not tolerate it.

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    Moderator nuisance26's Avatar
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    ~I was a flirter too until DH and I got serious(2-3 months in). I never flirted with other guys in front of him.
    Flirting with others when you're not in a serious relationship with someone is just fishing for interest. It's looking for one person to love you. If a person flirts with others while in a relationship they are looking for everyone to love them. That could mean they are friendly with high social needs or it could mean they aren't emotionally stable. It depends on the kind of "flirting" they exhibit. Like Ali said, if it makes you uncomfortable or jealous, that's a pretty big red flag. I would give him a few months into an exclusive relationship though before giving up.
    I'm gathering from your post that you are just interested in him and not dating yet. I agree that he could settle down when he's in a relationship. That happens a lot.
    But like Polly said, it's a pretty clear signal if he flirts with others in front of you or you are exclusively dating and he flirts with other women in general.
    So go into it carefully and take things slowly. The first few months of dating are supposed to be light and fun anyway.~

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    Registered User Mr Fixit's Avatar
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    There is a thin line between flirting, and just being friendly. So if he flirts with other women showing open sexual inuendos, he will not stop just because he is in a serious relationship with you.
    Some men need constant reassurance that they appeal to women, and the attention of 1 women is never enough to fill that desire.
    You have to decide if you can tolerate him flirting with other women, and if you can actually trust him knowing how he acts around them.
    I can tell you, statistically, guys like that usually end up being unfaithfull sooner or later!

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    Registered User CrazyCat's Avatar
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    Yes...I agree with Mr. Fixit~

    men like that eventually do cheat~I mean..after all....what's the point of them flirting to begin with? The constant reassurance never ends~even after being in a relationship. Some guys are always on the lookout for a 'better' relationship. For them..the grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side~LOL!

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    You could ask yourself why you are attracted to this person. Is it because of him seeming like a challenge?

    Personally I would just turn around and walk away. Seems as if you already have questions about this person because of his behavior.

  12. #11
    Registered User Lucas's Avatar
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    I once had a girlfriend try to convince me that if I found other women attractive I must not love her. I understand if a guy flirts with another lady in front of his girlfriend; that is a bad sign but if you're concerned he will do it when you're not around-that sounds insecure. That is unless the guy is clearly crossing the line with sexual innuendos or something like that.

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    There's certainly different degrees of flirting, as well as different degrees of people's perceptions of flirting. Unfortunately, without knowing what he is doing, we don't know how far he is taking it. We also don't know how sensitive you are to different levels of flirting.

    I know that I don't mind some minor flirting here and there. If it was constant, blatant, and seemed to be done to get a reaction out of me, I wouldn't put up with it.

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    Registered User Nishu's Avatar
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    This is a guy you're interested in, but not with? I don't see it as being a big deal. Just labeling him a "flirter" doesn't really give us enough information to say one way or the other.

    Personally, if someone was all uppity about my flirting before we even got together, that would be a signal to me to run the other way. That's a bit over the top, imo. I'll flirt if I damn well please, especially if I'm single.

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    I agree with Nishu. At this point you're only interested in him, not with him. Now, if you were in a relationship, that would be different.

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    Oh, I missed that she wasn't with the person yet. If that's the case, what difference does it make he's a flirter? Worry about it if he continues once you are together.

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