Single Mom's ...what's the one thing - Page 2
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  1. #16

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    Repairs to the house and upkeep of the yard.

  2. #17
    Registered User Mamaof2rugrats's Avatar
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    Finances. Without a doubt.

  3. #18
    Registered User struglew3kids's Avatar
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    Oh man I remember when I had double Pneumonia!! I don't know how I functioned. I had two kids in diapers too!

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  5. #19
    Registered User gottadance's Avatar
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    Well, I'm not a mom yet - on an adoption waiting list - but I already wish I had someone just to help with general chores - take out the garbage/recycling, help me move things, help with yardwork, etc.

  6. #20
    Registered User krbshappy71's Avatar
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    My long-distance bf will do a honey-do list on his visits. I keep it very short and only things that I really, really want done. He visits three times a year so I don't want his entire visit to be doing chores obviously but a bit of help really makes me feel so good and he likes being able to help me.

    What I immediately missed once divorced (ex moved several states away) was that when you're fighting the flu, it sucks to drive kids to school and pulling over to throw up. Or not pulling over in time.

    I really have issues with married people who do have involved spouses and do not REALIZE just how good they have it. They complain about the pettiest things and can't see how much their husband does for them. Please, just drive my kids to school when I have the flu or a fever running-to-the-bathroom stomach issue. Please!

  7. #21
    Registered User TheresaRHPS's Avatar
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    Finances and being sick are major things...

    ...but since my son is a little older now, I've realized how hard it is to take him out in public at his age on my own, lol.

    I have a good stroller, but its not always practical to take in to where we're going, and he doesn't always want to sit in it for very long. We were at the doctor's last week and the elevator was messed up...so I had to carry him and his diaper bag up 4 flights of stairs. Today, we were at the YMCA pool's changing room and I was trying to hold him and wriggle out of my wet swimsuit and put on dry clothes.

    He's always reaching for and grabbing anything within reach, and now, my once sweet lil' well behaved boy has started throwing minor temper tantrums, lol. If he wants to leave, he'll start with saying 'bye bye.' If that doesn't work, he'll start blowing raspberries and making a mean face. And if THAT doesn't work, he'll burst into tears.

  8. #22
    Registered User Sherryh's Avatar
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    Discipline. Ugh.

    My boyfriend helps me as much as he can when he's here, by talking with the kids and explaining why they need to be good... but he isn't here all the time.

    Definitely my weak suit.

  9. #23
    Registered User frugal is fun's Avatar
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    this is a stupid one but answering the door when the door bell rings at night. Freaks me right out!

  10. #24
    Registered User momof2boys2005's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mom2Many View Post
    Discipline!
    ITA!!!! There are times when I sooooo need to be the one removed from a situation because it's escalated and I'M just as upset as the kids>>> this is when I really need someone>> ya know like backup!!!

  11. #25
    Registered User suebeehoney's Avatar
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    Gosh is there just ONE thing? LOL

    I've been a single mom for years - going on 10 now - and even before we split up, I was basically a single mom anyway, because he was married to his job - before he met someone else and took off to marry her.

    I'm pretty darn self-sufficient now, and I've surprised myself at what I can do on my own. However, I do miss:

    -someone else to help do the runnning around, bill paying, disciplining, kid-fight-refereeing (yes they even do that as adults), housecleaning, B.S.-busting (mostly from DS19), travel arrangements, helping the older folks out, party planning, meal planning, car repairs, dog poop clean up....

    Is that enough of a list? LOL

    Kidding aside, my kids do a lot to help, just some days it doesn't seem like there's enough hands to do all the stuff that needs to be done, even with their help.

  12. #26
    Registered User Rhiamon's Avatar
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    Dealing with all the appointments for DD she has a disability, and mental health issues. Sometimes I just wish I had someone to tag team off of. It is hard when she is having a bad day, and the day started at 5 am because she woke up early and doesn't end until 1 am for me on those days because I have to wait until she is in bed to get everything I need to get done before the day starts again.

  13. #27
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    I was single for 9 years and the financial part was definitely the worst for me. I used to feel overwhelmed with meeting their physical, emotional and financial needs. Looking back now, I think I was really tired...all the time. But now, my greatest memories are from those difficult years

  14. #28
    Registered User momof2boys2005's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jmor View Post
    I was single for 9 years and the financial part was definitely the worst for me. I used to feel overwhelmed with meeting their physical, emotional and financial needs. Looking back now, I think I was really tired...all the time. But now, my greatest memories are from those difficult years
    Thank you for this post…I needed to hear that I might feel positive eventually about all this!!!
    I've been a mom for 19 years (11 year gap between brats LOL) and unfortunately many of them single. I'm plain old mentally and physically burnt-out! I need to figure out how to ‘decompress’ and relax better or I’m going to be acting like I'm 100 before I even touch 40!

  15. #29
    Registered User Nishu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by frugal is fun View Post
    this is a stupid one but answering the door when the door bell rings at night. Freaks me right out!
    Absolutely not a stupid gripe. I notice that when my husband is away my house makes funny noises. I've considered getting self defense spray to keep near the door just in case.

  16. #30
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    I need to figure out how to ‘decompress’ and relax better or I’m going to be acting like I'm 100 before I even touch 40!

    I had three kids, and when I divorced their ages were 2, 4, and 10. Their dad was NO help and it was all on me. I remember always feeling overwhelmed. And I look back now and I see how no one helped me. No family members never just offered to babysit or take an interest in their lives. Even my mom didn't want to be bothered with my kids. And that's OK, but if people cared more about each other, they would see that sometimes people need help and try and reach out.

    I hope you have family that can help you. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.

    One thing about those days....seemed like God showed up in some powerful ways back then to let me know He was with me. Usually when I was having a melt down, He would show up and bring that peace with Him that only He can give. Then I would relax and start all over again.

    But yeah, when your kids are grown you look back and see all your mistakes and it feels awful, but then you have these great memories too, and the struggle you went through with your kids draws you closer together. Sorry for being so long winded. : )

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