What would you do? - Page 2
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  1. #16
    Registered User dolphin's Avatar
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    I think as long as you are going along with what your lawyer knows about then you are doing what is best for all of you. I agree about you not seeing a dime if you go to court. As far as your ex dh and his visitation right?, well, he's their dad. You can't just 'expect' him to do wrong. He already knows they will tell on him so I think you are safe with his limited visitation. Hugs and glad you are back.

  2. #17
    Registered User Jamauk's Avatar
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    Hi Karen,
    I hope you don't mind me just jumping in here, even though I haven't really been keeping up with your whole saga (I just happened upon it).

    Having gone through a very similiar situation with my ex and his first wife, I would reccommend taking the deal. Because he had no lawyer, he used his ex's lawyer (just like your situation) and it was written in that he would be responsible for half of the legal bill. You did the responsible thing in hiring a lawyer, don't let him freeload off of that - make him pay for it.

    Could you get it written into the deal that he must arrange to be off work on the nights he has the girls? I mean everyone gets *some* off days, right?

    I'm sorry you are going through this.

  3. #18
    Registered User annymoll's Avatar
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    I would follow your attorney's advice. I would add in that he must keep you informed of where he is working.I say great if he's a stripper.Better than claiming he cannot work at all.Better chance to get money. If he is going to leave the girls alone while he works, he will be doing something similar to what your situation was over the summer.I would offer him your plan for emergencies or discuss with him a plan.Good luck. You will need it.(Why would he care if the girls visited grandma over the summer?- Shakes head.)
    Last edited by annymoll; 11-25-2007 at 09:09 PM.

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  5. #19
    Registered User struglew3kids's Avatar
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    Why is it that we women are so thoughtful to their situation even knowing that they don't think of ours, even though we are the ones with their children? I tried all of that and guess what? NADA. He did not live up to his word. Protect yourself and your daughters. He may not pay now, but he will.

  6. #20
    Registered User Edna_E's Avatar
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    You need the court to order that he have appropriate care for the girls at night - or that they not spend nights in his care. Otherwise, he WILL repeat the prior behavior. he is willing to concede right now because if he can keep it out of court you have no way of enforcing the agreement. Don't be a sucker to his manipulation.

  7. #21
    Registered User miss_thrifty's Avatar
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    I agree with edna, court ordewr making sure its writtne doen that appropraite care be ther for them if he's working and if u could and only u know how far he'll take this and be hateful to the point because of lack of control.
    Do what u need to do to take care of your kids and yourself and that get money wise and safety wise in written form , otherwise he'll cause un problems down the road.

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