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  1. #1
    Registered User northernmom2boys's Avatar
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    Default sort of ticked off

    Im a stay at home mom to three boys.I keep a clean home,there is a warm meal on the table every night and I love being home ot take care of my kids.
    my 10 yr old came home from the first day of school yesterdy and said they had to write down what their prenents did for a living,well he putdown my husbands info then he asked the teacher what to put down cause I dont have a ''job''
    she said oh just put nothing!!!
    I have to admit I was and are kind of ticked off she said that,,I do nothing????? ughhh

  2. #2
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    If the question was in the context of making a living, then I would imagine the answer was accurate. There is no income involved with a stay at home mom. Besides, I highly doubt that the teacher actually thinks you do absolutely "nothing".

    What would you have preferred your child put down, within the context of the question?

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    Registered User krbshappy71's Avatar
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    Hugs to you. If you are able to, you could try to make light of it to your son by saying "oh I wish I was there so I could have helped you, here are a few of my job titles:

    Chef, Housekeeper, Career consultant,"

    Really open up that conversation about it so your child can honor you and your decision to stay home to run the household. Here is an article that I love:

    The price of a mom: $138,095 - MSN Money

    Look, I bet you make more than hubby!

    I was a stay-at-home mom for 4 years, it isn't for the faint at heart and it certainly is priceless.

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  5. #4
    Registered User imagine's Avatar
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    My high school son came home with a Career survey he had to ask one woman and one man.

    He interviewed Hubby then turned to me and said Now your turn.

    I am a stay at home mom so I thought I couldn't answer the questions. Hubby said "Why not? It is your career right now" So I answered my question and label my career Homemaker

    It asked about your feelings about your career choice Why you picked the choice and how did it affect your family, friends, leisure, time, and spiritual development.

    It was surprising how well Hubby and I answers matched up. You can really see that He and I see us as a team. The two careers fit together perfectly to meet our goals for family, friends, leisure, etc.

    The teacher gave him a 100% for the assignment.

    Hubby's response and the teachers repose validated me in realizing that SAHM for the time being is my career.

    Hugs to you I'm sure the teacher didn't mean anything by it your son did tell her you didn't have a job. So start letting those boys of yours know you have a job and they and the house are it right now. Another Hug for you

  6. #5
    Registered User Nishu's Avatar
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    The question would irritate me. My daughters are only 10 and 7 and we've already encountered issues with what rank everyone's daddy is and what they do. Plus, there's a ton of people who are out of work right now or under employed. Even in better economic times, not every kid or parent wants to share what they do. I think the question is rather inappropriate.

    And ETA, yeah, "nothing" would irritate me, too. If it means anything at all, I know how much work goes into what you do.

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    Registered User nodmicks's Avatar
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    I really like KRBSs response!

  8. #7
    Registered User HappyMama's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nodmicks View Post
    I really like KRBSs response!
    I do as well!

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    I was also a stay at home mom to 3 boys and I would not have taken that like you did. I didn't do anything for a living (paycheck) so putting nothing would have been the thing to put.

  10. #9
    Registered User northernmom2boys's Avatar
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    see I see me being as stay at home mom as ''what I do for a living'' so saying I do nothing irritated me
    Its ok I tell my kids what I do is important as well and I am very appreciated(99%) of the time lol

  11. #10
    Registered User Trishagirl's Avatar
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    Yeah that would tick me off too cause you do a whole lot more than nothing and he needs to realize that too! Sit him down and have a good talk with him about all that you do for him and his family.

  12. #11
    Registered User bumplett's Avatar
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    I'm with Nishu on this one - seems like a nosy question to me - just think how you would feel if you were that kid who's dad was laid off, mom was underemployed, and you moved in with your grandmom because you lost your house.

    - just sayin'.

  13. #12
    Registered User Momto5RN's Avatar
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    they didnt say you did nothing

    she said to put nothing aka leave it blank ( if your 10 yo even got what she said exactly right i have 5 kids the youngest being 10 they dont always get word for word correct esp the boys )

    if you do not bring in an income - which is want the term making a living means - then it was correct .

    doesnt mean you dont contribute to the household in many ways ,

    i feel bad for teachers - everyone is ready to jump down their throat for every little thing anymore .

    and really we cant stop talking about everything and anything because one some kids may have parents out of work or a sahm or living with grandparents if anything that could be a lesson in itself and if the kids all say who is better based on what their dad does- well kids like that will find something to make themselves feel important no matter what -



    its up to the parents to take what was taught at school or brought up at school and turn it into further lessons at home as they see fit- a teacher cant pacify 20 parents by specially catering their lesson plans to each ones life happenings

    as one teacher always says i will believe 1/2 of what your child tells me if you will believe half what your child tells you

    sorry but i think you are taking it out of context . yeah when i was a sahm i could be worth 135000 if i had 20 people doing everything i did but i didnt get paid that cash so it wasnt making a living - but i contributed to my household in ways money couldnt


    just because one makes no actual income doesnt mean they do nothing- look at what volunteers do for the world .

    and just because a teacher spoke the truth - if you arent working you arent " making a living " in the definition of the words - doesnt mean she is anti sahm or thinks you do nothing .
    and we cant change definitions to fit our needs or it confuses kids

  14. #13
    Registered User Nishu's Avatar
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    and really we cant stop talking about everything and anything because one some kids may have parents out of work or a sahm or living with grandparents if anything that could be a lesson in itself and if the kids all say who is better based on what their dad does- well kids like that will find something to make themselves feel important no matter what -
    My mom was a truck driver. I probably would have been embarrassed telling everyone. I was already known as the poor kid, and trust me when kids find a little nugget like that they'll run with it. Just because kids will find ways to be jerks to each other doesn't mean we have to add fuel to the fire.

    Aside from the fact that children and parents should be able to expect a reasonable amount of privacy, I think it's bad form to go around modeling that kind of inappropriate questioning. As long as we're teaching children to go around asking rude questions, maybe we can cut right to the chase and ask for dollar income amounts or maybe sexual orientation.

    I'm really glad I don't send my kids to school, because I don't know how i would deal with things like this without completely ticking people off and making myself look like a jerk. I would have probably told my kids to tell their teacher that mommy was an exotic dancer if I weren't trying to raise honest people in addition to people who know not to ask rude questions.

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    Registered User Libby's Avatar
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    There's a huge difference in asking what parents do 'for a living' and 'what do they do that earns an income'.

    Example: If one is retired, they can be seen as either living it up (traveling around the globe etc) OR struggling to make ends meet (being older on less income = eating $1 store cat food.)

    I agree, the question is 'subjective' however the teacher could've gone one step further and explain to the child(ren) that though mom (or dad) doesn't bring in an income, they save money and run the home - ie homemaker.

    OP - would you prefer to be called a homemaker? Some find that just as insulting. Again...I think its all a matter of perspective and open to interpretation. I am sorry that you felt belittled or put down by the teacher.

  16. #15
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    I think the question is inappropriate in a class room setting. It is none of the teacher's business as to what his/her student's parents do for a living. Every situation is different and some may not wish to discuss why someone is or isn't working etc.

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