Bizarre wedding invitation
Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Ontario
    Posts
    39
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Bizarre wedding invitation

    What do you ladies think about this? My husband plays in a band and one of the band members daughter is getting married. I've been introduced to her and never had a conversation with her. There are two questions I have. 1. We have been invited to a jack and jill and the band will be playing so we won't be able to decline, the mother is asking for money and money is very short right now. How much money do you think is appropriate? 2. We have been asked to the wedding also, not the ceremony or dinner reception but after that to the dance. This is held at a expensive 5 star county inn. I feel uncomfortable about this since we really don't know the girl and I feel somewhat used. What kind of gift do you think is appropriate. The family has a great deal of money and we are not as comfortable financially as we appear. The sad thing is this girl did not keep in touch with her girlfriends when she got involved with this man, she is 21 and he is 28 and the wedding guests are relatives and her parents friends. Her mother is her maid of honour. First time I've heard of that!!

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,100
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    0

    Default

    If you don't know the girl, I don't think that you should feel obligated to attend. By inviting you just to the dance, it sounds like she's fulfilling an obligation to the band members.

    Me, I wouldn't attend.

    Susie in MN

  3. #3
    Heather Bob
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    7,312
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    26

    Default

    Hi Hannah!

    First I wouldn't feel obligated in the least to attend the dance, if you would like you could mail a card (just a card, no $$) For the Jack and Jill, I know around here there is usually a wrapped box where "donations" can be made when you go in, cash/no card, you could put in an envelope whatever you feel comfortable with, no need to sign your name.

    I honestly think all the festivites surrounding a wedding are getting out of hand. Showers are lovely for the bride but even them I find people are giving what I would consider a wedding gift. Jack and Jill's were to replace a stag and now I see around here, they are having Jack and Jill's (raising lots of money), have a bunch of showers AND a stag. There was a couple that just got married here a few weekends ago and between the stag and Jack and Jill they received $8,000.00!

  4. Remove Advertisements
    FrugalVillage.com
    Advertisements
     

  5. #4
    Master Dollar Stretcher aka DixieBob Dixie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    5,451
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    26

    Default Re: Bizarre wedding invitation

    Originally posted by Hannah
    the mother is asking for money
    Tacky, tacky, tacky!
    I have no advice, but I wouldn't give more than I could comfortably give.

  6. #5

    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    18
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    0

    Default

    asking for money??? I have never heard of that. Whats a jack and jill.... like a couples shower? if thats the case, tell mumsie dearest that you have already picked up a gift.... whats a great gift you ask? (ok, so you didnt ask, but I will tell you anyways ) a garden hose and a sprayer or set of lawnchairs or a cooler. You would be suprized that people just dont have these items when first starting out.... Plus, they are relatively inexpensive if purchesed at walmart or kmart....

    You cant attend the wedding, but will be attending the dance.... dont bring a gift then. Perhaps a card.... maybe some cash.... Thats tacky tho, invited to only one.... Im willing to bet they have all sorts of tacky ways to grope money out of the peoples pockets at the dance as well.... (I find extremely tacky and refused to have them at my wedding. )

    as for the mother being the matron of honor... I can see it, I have been to a wedding where the best man was the grooms dad. He had a terrific relationship with his dad, and it got better as they aged. However, if its becouse of lack of friends.... another story.

  7. #6
    Registered User Katybird's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Posts
    12,789
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    34

    Default

    I would not worry about giving a gift at all. You don't know the bride or groom and if your DH is playing in the band (for free I am assuming) then I would just let that be the gift. He is taking a time that he could be doing something he wanted to and playing for the wedding so I think his time and effort are gift enough.

  8. #7
    Master Dollar Stretcher aka DixieBob Dixie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    5,451
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    26

    Default

    Originally posted by Katybird
    I would not worry about giving a gift at all. You don't know the bride or groom and if your DH is playing in the band (for free I am assuming) then I would just let that be the gift. He is taking a time that he could be doing something he wanted to and playing for the wedding so I think his time and effort are gift enough.
    I agree!

  9. #8

    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    2,666
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    0

    Default

    I find it appaling that a person would tell you what giftto bring to a party. To be registared someplace is one thing, but to inform people what to bring. OY VEY!

Similar Threads

  1. Should I cancel a dinner invitation
    By Hamada in forum General Chat
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 01-11-2012, 03:58 PM
  2. open invitation to 'lurkers'....
    By sabrelvssammy in forum General Chat
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 03-01-2009, 02:50 PM
  3. How bizarre
    By Darlene in forum General Chat
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 03-29-2007, 03:36 PM
  4. I have one Moola invitation
    By chatterweb in forum Support
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-22-2006, 08:38 PM
  5. A lovely invitation
    By Julia Kimber in forum General Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 11-02-2005, 09:44 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •