Frugal Village Forums banner

1 - 18 of 18 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,480 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
just to help out a little?!?!? My kids are 9 and 5. They help out as much as they can or when I ask them, but there are times I would love to walk in my house and the dishes, laundry, cleaning was done! That never happened when I was married, but a girl can wish huh?! I am a in home daycare provider so I am always here, and always cleaning or doing something, i am tired!!!

Can you hire a husband for like 6 hours? I have a list of things that i CAN do but will be so much easier if a man did it! Is that bad to say???? Anyone else feel like this?!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
109 Posts
If I lived in a bigger town that had people who clean houses, I would splurge and have someone come by once a month. I hate cleaning, I'm not good at it, and knowing someone was coming by to help would keep me on my toes with the day to day stuff.

And yah, helping a little with the house upkeep is on my list of 'husbandly qualities' that I've got my eye out for. :yoyo:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
787 Posts
I am married and I know what you mean.

My dh is great around the house, but there are so many things that still need to be done. I would love to come one once in a while and look around and know that I didnt' have to do anything.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
330 Posts
Oh yeah.

It's a huge responsibility to go this route *alone* -- not just in terms of finances and the physical "work" involved with maintaining a home, but the non-physical aspects as well. I don't "need" someone to share the joy with, although it would be nice, but the part that is hard for me is carrying all of the mental stuff -- worrying and planning and thinking and keeping on top of what needs to be done and when it needs to be done and how am I going to fit it in. For me, that translates into a sense of constant pressure, which is one of the reasons I'm trying so hard to declutter, organize, and simplify my life!

I should say, tho', that as annoying as it is to figure how I'm going to manage to use the snow blower when my child is in the house alone and still asleep, I experience a huge sigh of gratitude every time I see a couple arguing in front of their child/ren.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LexTysMommy

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,424 Posts
Oh yeah.

I should say, tho', that as annoying as it is to figure how I'm going to manage to use the snow blower when my child is in the house alone and still asleep, I experience a huge sigh of gratitude every time I see a couple arguing in front of their child/ren.
This reminds me of when I used to run outside and cut the grass while my DD was napping. I know people probably thought I was nuts for cutting the grass at 1 in the afternoon when it was hot. But, hey, nap time was nap time, couldn't change that without messing up the entire routine.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
908 Posts
This is one of the things I miss from being married, having someone to help out or even watching my child while I run to the store, etc. I so used to doing everything while having the kids with me that I feel lost when I can actual go somewhere alone.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
94 Posts
Yes at times I do wish I had a man in my life......but not the one I had. Yes he would help clean, but I would hear about it for YEARS. I told him, hey honey I work and I don't throw that at your face. He was way to controlling even in how or where I started to clean, so I rather he not be around when I did my house work. I guess I dreames of a hubby who would want to be in the kitchen w/me..starting dinner. I guess I watch to much tv hehe.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
639 Posts
I would love to be in a relationship in the near future. After 5 years of doing it all on my own, I am just darn tired! Just having another adult to talk with would be nice. on that note, I have been blessed with family and friends who do help alot. When my son was too young for me to mow and supervise him I hired a friend for real cheap, one year I exchanged furniture I no longer wanted for the whole year of lawn work. The have been times here or there that a friend of mine has done some simple housework for me in exchange for childcare or a ride or such. Recently some friends of mine brought their husbands to fix my furnace for me, that was awesome!!
It is stressful and hard and lonely, and talking with friends who have been there or are there now helps alot.
And the next time I get married it will be sooo much better because of all I've learned and how I've grown from this time on my own.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
291 Posts
I too miss being able to run out for an errand without having to get the kids ready and listening to the complain about it. lol

My ex did do alot of cleaning and such but he used to just throw stuff away. Important stuff. It used to drive me crazy. Then he would tell me how my way of cleaning is wrong. I would rather live in a dirty house than live another day with him.

I have learned to many things on my own but like others have said I just don't want to.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
258 Posts
I SURE do sweetie!!!!

I am the single mother of a 7 year old son who is "learning" to do more, but still has limits. As I tell him (I am the MOAD..the mom and the dad and I have to do it all). Thats why I tell him that the day he leaves for college, I am in Hawaii for a 2 week vacation...am ALREADY saving;)

Rhonda
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
783 Posts
So sorry you have to do everything. Maybe you'll find your help mate sooner then later. I am very lucky My honey always works with me and it the two of us against the never ending work from our children. Candy
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,693 Posts
No kids here, unless you count the goats, but I have a little ranch to run, so I am definitely sympathetic. There are times, when I'm out in the rain with a hoe, clearing out ditches; catching goats to trim their hooves or vaccinate/worm them; trying to muscle bales of hay into the pasture; carrying 50 pound bags of feed into the tack room; etc. and so on ad nauseum, when I think how nice it would be to have some help, especially since I also work full-time AND have the house to keep clean. I don't think I could handle a full-time partner, though. I just need to hire a ranch hand and a maid, and then I'd be in clover!! :D (Well, actually, I'd be in the poor house, so I guess I'm stuck doing it all myself.)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
460 Posts
just to help out a little?!?!? My kids are 9 and 5. They help out as much as they can or when I ask them, but there are times I would love to walk in my house and the dishes, laundry, cleaning was done! That never happened when I was married, but a girl can wish huh?! I am a in home daycare provider so I am always here, and always cleaning or doing something, i am tired!!!

Can you hire a husband for like 6 hours? I have a list of things that i CAN do but will be so much easier if a man did it! Is that bad to say???? Anyone else feel like this?!
~

There are some churches that have programs for single moms, widows, etc. that will help fix things around the house, etc.. You might see if a church near you would be willing to help.

Also, get together with a group of your friends & each week/month pick a day where each girlfriend gets to have their house cleaned by the other "girls" on a rotation basis. Or swap something with another friend/neighbor for them to clean your house & you cook their dinner, watch their kids, etc (on different days!! or the same if you prefer)

Kim
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,774 Posts
I have a husband, but he is at work all the time, and doesn't do anything around here anyway.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
645 Posts
Hi there - I'm a single woman on an adoption waiting list after 2.5 years of trying to have a child via fertility treatments (no go - eggs no good/immune issues). Even without a child, there are many times I wish I had a great guy around to help me out. Right now, I have a really good handyman and about once a year I get him over here and have him do a bunch of stuff. When I bought this house 8 years ago, I thought I'd probably meet someone, get married and then have kids - it's a big house. But after lots of dating, haven't found Mr. Right yet. But I don't give up hope - wanting to have help and wanting to have the extra income (OK - and love and a supportive partner) - keep me dating.

In one of my single mom by choice support groups, we recently created a list of the members who are willing to help others out in times of need and what they're willing to do. Of course, this is a local group, but maybe others could create similar lists with friends.

I want to tell you guys about Mamapedia™ - The wisdom of moms™ - it's a national website but you put in your ZIP code and it takes you to a local forum where you meet all local moms. They give referrals and recommendations for anything and everything local - daycare, plumbers, schools, etc. and chat about parenting issues and other stuff. I've found it to be SO helpful because it's so local. You also might find cheap help on craigslist.com. So many people need work these days and they'll do it for really cheap. I found someone willing to clean a house for $35, others willing to do any chores for minimum wage. You could hire someone for 3 hours for $30 and imagine all you could get done?

Hope this helps - hang in there ladies - I'm totally with you and know when I have a child there are going to be some challenging days/weeks!
 
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
Top