[oheoh's momma]

ok this was a gripe last year at Easter: Grnadma wants a ham with her homemade wine sauce we hate it ..we would perfer a ham pinapples...My daughter doesn't eat ham but I can always fry her a piece of chicken..
she also wants to make sweet pots and fruit salad which we won't eat.....

we would prefer to do chicken on the grill.. that has always been the first official grill of spring.. we done this becasue as a blended family the kids are sick of ham by the time they get here....

at Christmas I threw out so much food it was ridiculous.. cakes, pies, bananna pudding though most of this was eat... homemade candy... Thanksgiving the same all her family foods were thrown out....Touboli, cauliflower and cheese, her sweet pots....

we have also just forgot grilled chicken and done dogs and burgers with the works....

I don't like complications....ugh and I don't want to cook 2 meals or pay for it either...

The only thing we agree on is recees eggs

 

[LynnLC]

Buy & cook what you want. She can buy & cook what she wants.

 

[Spirit Deer]

Can you make much smaller quantities of items you each want, just enough for those who will want them? Like just buy a thick slice or two of ham instead of making a whole huge ham, or cook a small container of sweet potatoes instead of a big casserole dish.

Chicken on the grill would freeze well as a leftover, and the ham could be grilled and leftovers frozen too, so no real extra work. Buy a small ham and have the butcher cut it in half so you only have to cook half. Ham is usually on sale around Easter and it's nice to have some cheap food in the freezer. Etc.

Many leftovers will freeze well, so you shouldn't need to throw out much if you make room in the freezer.

Don't make Easter into a power struggle, just adapt your meal plan so it works for everyone and compromise. It's not worth the energy it'll take to do battle over it.

There doesn't have to be a lot of waste or a lot of drama.

 

[Contrary Housewife]

Change it up completely. Do easter brunch at a restaurant or something. That way, nobody has to cook.

 

[bent]

so who's home will be hosting? IMHO-I'd fix what I wanted to eat, what my children would eat and let everyone else bring what they wanted to eat....... if I wanted to grill I'd grill-anyone wanting to eat could provide meat and fixings .....

we've not had a big 'family' meal in about 15 yrs. I was in tn, when I relocated back the other cousins were with their families-inlaws. now for my family Me/db-his family who chooses to visit/mom we got to a local resturant and eat... no dishes to clean no meals to cook.
with my family m/dd/ds/their dad I cook what we eat and in a small amt- we don't do leftover turkey... not that it was mentioned but please make it easy on yourself. change it this year..... big family (inform each member who's going to attend the dinner to bring something they want to eat- give them your menu and let them decide.) if no one eats it then tell the person- we love you but don't bring that this year please.

 

[nancycg56]

If it's at your house, make what you want. If it's at her house, tell her you will be bringing the meal.

 

[Spirit Deer]

OP and her MIL live in the same house.

 

[ladytoysdream]

Can you make much smaller quantities of items you each want, just enough for those who will want them? Like just buy a thick slice or two of ham instead of making a whole huge ham, or cook a small container of sweet potatoes instead of a big casserole dish. Chicken on the grill would freeze well as a leftover, and the ham could be grilled and leftovers frozen too, so no real extra work. Buy a small ham and have the butcher cut it in half so you only have to cook half. Ham is usually on sale around Easter and it's nice to have some cheap food in the freezer. Etc. Many leftovers will freeze well, so you shouldn't need to throw out much if you make room in the freezer. Don't make Easter into a power struggle, just adapt your meal plan so it works for everyone and compromise. It's not worth the energy it'll take to do battle over it.
There doesn't have to be a lot of waste or a lot of drama.

This post by Spirit Deer nails it for you
-----------------------

oheoh's momma......I cannot comprehend you throwing out food, especially with the store prices.

QUOTE..at Christmas I threw out so much food it was ridiculous.. cakes, pies, bananna pudding though most of this was eat... homemade candy... Thanksgiving the same all her family foods were thrown out....Touboli, cauliflower and cheese, her sweet pots....
UNQUOTE

 

[Libby]

I vote to blaze new trails....create a new Easter tradition and make something that is un-traditional. IF you do ham normally - try fish? Try to compose a menu with something that everyone agrees upon.

 

[oheoh's momma]

i suggested that we do something new...she won't budge.. I also pay for it... she wants to do things the way her family did it in OK...well that was a big family about 40 people... it was huge

my daughter brings a dessert and the rest is me...
I said after Christmas no more over kill..I just don't feel like it. nor do I have the money.

she won't pay for it either....

hubs wants to grill chicken, put corn in foil on the grill and call it good..... I am pretty much satisified with that... the kids and their /others won't mind either..

there will be many more disagreements in the next few months..not looking forward to them.....

 

[Spirit Deer]

I agree with the idea of doing something radically different.

I rolled a fatty for our Easter dinner one year. The four of us all loved it, especially after it was smoked.




Bet this wasn't what you thought I was talking about, was it?

 

[ladytoysdream]

I agree with the idea of doing something radically different.
I rolled a fatty for our Easter dinner one year.
The four of us all loved it, especially after it was smoked.
Bet this wasn't what you thought I was talking about, was it?

You're cooking it over that pot ?
What is in the pot ....charcoal ?

So it's bacon wrapped...what is the interior part of the roll ?

 

[oheoh's momma]

looks fab Paige doesn't eat bacon... but it does look like it has pontential...yummy

is it a bacon wrapped stuffed meatloaf......nor meat loaf......she is picky

 

[oheoh's momma]

But i would yummy

 

[Spirit Deer]

The pot is a Cobb grill. It has a domed lid so we can smoke stuff in it. Love that thing. Here's the new fancy shmancy version we use now.

It's the same thing except with a different base and a few other changes. We love it because it packs up small in its little carry bag so it's nice to take camping. It uses only about eight charcoal briquettes, so we don't have to haul as much charcoal with. And the base does not get hot, so it can be used on wood decks and picnic tables without being a fire hazard.

There are all sorts of versions of fatties. That particular one was stuffed with double-smoked ham from the deli, Maytag blue cheese, and onion. You can do cheeseburger fatties, pizza fatties, Reuben fatties, all kinds, whatever your imagination dreams up. I use my meatloaf recipe to help keep some of the fat under control a little, but the original fatties were stuffed with cooked bacon and made from pork sausage and a lot of people still do those. They are a cardiologist's nightmare! They're usually made in a smoker but I haven't learned to use ours yet, and the Cobb works pretty well.

 

[Spirit Deer]

Here's another Easter dinner we did one year. No pics of the after, but you get the idea. We had pork loin cooked in the largest Dutch oven with potatoes and stuffing and gravy made later, apple crisp in the bottom DO in the stack, green bean casserole in the middle one, and sweet potatoes in the top one. A very simple holiday meal and easy to prepare so nobody had to work too hard.

We were at a nearby state park with no one else in it. We didn't see a soul all weekend after we checked in, including the rangers. Perfect. My mom and her friend joined us so that was a very nice holiday.

We did an entire turkey dinner with all the trimmings one year for Thanksgiving, too, at a state park in Wisconsin, using Dutch ovens. Yum!

 

[Libby]

i suggested that we do something new...she won't budge.. I also pay for it... she wants to do things the way her family did it in OK...well that was a big family about 40 people... it was huge

my daughter brings a dessert and the rest is me...
I said after Christmas no more over kill..I just don't feel like it. nor do I have the money.

she won't pay for it either....

hubs wants to grill chicken, put corn in foil on the grill and call it good..... I am pretty much satisified with that... the kids and their /others won't mind either..

there will be many more disagreements in the next few months..not looking forward to them.....

Please don't take this the wrong way but if she's not willing to budge then maybe just treat the holiday meal as any other day and cook normally. No fun, I know. Don't cook anything fancy. Food is food right? Its not like you're depriving her of her or anyone else in your family's basic needs from being met. Mean, I know. Maybe this will get it through her head that its not her way or the highway, KWIM? *hugs*

BTW: Whats the point in cooking food for 40 people if only 4-5 people are going to be eating? Maybe rehash the issue of excess food equating to waste and no one wants to eat that specific menu. Plus the menu she wants isn't in the budget.

 

[oheoh's momma]

that really is not a bad idea.. we don't have grandchildren...My daughter will work and so will her boyfriend..Our son is at work... so why not treat it like any other day...go to church and not worry about the meal....thanks libby

 

[Lora88]

I just am not getting why grandma has so much say and control in your life

 

[forHISglory]

Can you make much smaller quantities of items you each want, just enough for those who will want them? Like just buy a thick slice or two of ham instead of making a whole huge ham, or cook a small container of sweet potatoes instead of a big casserole dish.

Chicken on the grill would freeze well as a leftover, and the ham could be grilled and leftovers frozen too, so no real extra work. Buy a small ham and have the butcher cut it in half so you only have to cook half. Ham is usually on sale around Easter and it's nice to have some cheap food in the freezer. Etc.

Many leftovers will freeze well, so you shouldn't need to throw out much if you make room in the freezer.

Don't make Easter into a power struggle, just adapt your meal plan so it works for everyone and compromise. It's not worth the energy it'll take to do battle over it.

There doesn't have to be a lot of waste or a lot of drama.

This is the best advice so far! Great compromise!

There is something to be said for traditions. They help give a family roots. But traditions should not shatter a family. So holding on to Grandma's ham as a tradition can be done..... just on a small scale.

Our family has traditions with food over the holidays. We cherish them, and recall past times. But we constantly are tweaking and changing some things with the current times. I would say don't make it a battle. That wasn't the intent of Easter....