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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Ok, so if I have to do this, I don't see why the government shouldn't have to, too!!

I am looking at my income and outgo in 2009...and I am just not sure if I see how I can do this. I've been married for 2 years. Hubby is a college student and staunchly refuses to get a job even during breaks, saying "Why should I get a job, I don't spend that much."

I bought my grandmother's house (for 75k) to try to help her out since she is moving into assisted living, which appeared to be in my budget, but when I calculate the taxes and additional costs, it's clear I will have to cut back drastically. Please take a look and let me know if you see anything out of whack that you think I can cut back on.

Income
My paycheck: $45,000

Outgo
Property taxes: $2,747.46 (6)
Income taxes: $10,282.74 (23%)
Mortgage payment: $5,978.40 (13%)
Home insurance: $644.00 (1.4%)
Misc. home repairs $1,200 (2.7%)
- to go into a savings acct. No repairs appear to be on the horizon with the house.

Utilities
Telephone: $288.48 (.6%)
Cell phones: $196.98 (.4%)
- these are emergency-only phones, Tracfones. currently 200 mins on each.
Cable & Internet: $1,320 (2.9%)
- needed for the land line
Electricity: $1,500 (3.3%)
Natural gas: $1,200 (2.7%)
- we live in a subzero climate
Water: $600 (1.3%)

Savings
Emergency fund: $1,200 (2.7%)
Retirement savings: $3,150.00 (7.0%)
- plus company matching
Car insurance: $1,514
Gasoline: $2,400
AAA membership: $52.00
- We have a 10 year old car, and a 2 year old car. No mass transit in our area
Oil changes, tire replacement, repair fund, parking, tolls, registrations: $1,600 (3.5%)

Food
Dining out: $120 (.3%)
Groceries: $3,600 (8%)
- hubby refuses to eat rice, corn, bread, or potatoes - only meat & veggies

Misc
Martial arts studio: $900 (2%)
- I have been doing it for years and this is sincerely one of the last things I will give up
At work fitness center: $120 (.3%)

Pets
Fea & heartworm medications: $304 (.7%)
Veterinary care plan: $478.80 (1.1%)
Food, treats, and toys: $660 (1.5%)
- hubby only wants organic, all natural food for dogs which is expensive
License fees: $24

Personal
My clothes: $200 (.4%)
- I work in a business environment and need business clothes like suits
Hubby's clothes: $150 (.3%)
Haircuts and personal items: $90 (.2%)
Movies, books, tickets, etc. $120 (.3%)
Wedding, birthday, holiday gifts: $180 (.4%)
Parties: $180 (.4%)

School tuition (after financial aid): $2,000 (4.4%)
Books and supplies: $300 (.7%)
Guaranteed parking on campus: $405 (.9%)

Church donations: $1,008 (2.2%)
Other donations: $744.00 (1.6%)

Health insurance: $1,396.46 (3.1%)
Dental insurance: $171.34 (.4%)
- no health problems, copays are paid out of a health spending account

Total: $49,025.66 ($4,025.66 over income)

HELP!
 

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Can you cancel the gym membership since you do martial arts? Do you order your flea and heartworm meds online for your dogs, it's much cheaper then buying them at the vets office. Can you cut you food budget down from 300 a month to 200? Those are just some suggestions.
 

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What about cutting out cable tv? Your budget is pretty low for expenses, so I don't know what else you could do. I vote to kick hubby in the butt and have him get a part time job. ;)
 

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well, in my opinion & you prolly don't want to hear this, HUBBY needs to contribute !!

he is demanding organic and meat and potatoes and you are on a :spam: food budget. trust me I was married to someone just like him and I put him through law school too but he would never get a job and it just sucked the life out of me !!

I am going to wish you the best here because from what is written he doesn't look like much of a partner to you as far as equal contributions to the budget are concerned.

College students can work part time. Heck I work full time and I work part time and I have a pretty demanding job ... So he needs to get a JOB like now (even if it's only part time). That will solve a lot of your money problems. good luck and I hope he has a change of heart about getting a job.
 

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Hubby is a college student and staunchly refuses to get a job even during breaks, saying "Why should I get a job, I don't spend that much."
I just wanted to add, if he has this attitude, then he has no right to request any special food for himself OR the animals. You should buy whatever is cheapest, or whatever you want. If he wants better things, he needs to contribute.

I don't want this to come off as a double standard, because I don't work. My husband brings in all the money. BUT I do make sure all the bills are paid and I do all the shopping and budgeting and if he wants anything for himself I try to make sure he can have it. Plus, I contribute to the income in any little ways I can.
 
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I just wanted to add, if he has this attitude, then he has no right to request any special food for himself OR the animals. You should buy whatever is cheapest, or whatever you want. If he wants better things, he needs to contribute.

Ditto!!!

Why does he have a clothes balance? Does he wear suits to school? If he wants to adhere himself firmly in a higher tax bracket, he needs to find the money for it.:furious::down:
 

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I forgot to add maybe you could cut down on your Monetary ammount of donations... Frankly you don't have it to spare... Maybe you could give it in the form of time?
 

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Beyond the financial side of it, where or how does he think he will build up resume credentials for full-time employment after graduation without working during breaks or on a part-time basis?
 

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I don't think that I know any college students who didn't have to work at least part time! While it would be difficult to not see each other as much in the evenings and weekends, you will likely be a much happier wife if you are not so stressed out about the finances. I think he is being selfish by expecting you to completely support him when that is too much for you to do.

Just a thought-if you are in a college town, could you take in a roommate to help with expnses?
 

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Ok, so if I have to do this, I don't see why the government shouldn't have to, too!!

I am looking at my income and outgo in 2009...and I am just not sure if I see how I can do this. I've been married for 2 years. Hubby is a college student and staunchly refuses to get a job even during breaks, saying "Why should I get a job, I don't spend that much."

I bought my grandmother's house (for 75k) to try to help her out since she is moving into assisted living, which appeared to be in my budget, but when I calculate the taxes and additional costs, it's clear I will have to cut back drastically. Please take a look and let me know if you see anything out of whack that you think I can cut back on.

Income
My paycheck: $45,000

Outgo
Property taxes: $2,747.46 (6)
Income taxes: $10,282.74 (23%)
Mortgage payment: $5,978.40 (13%)
Home insurance: $644.00 (1.4%)
Misc. home repairs $1,200 (2.7%)
- to go into a savings acct. No repairs appear to be on the horizon with the house.

Utilities
Telephone: $288.48 (.6%)
Cell phones: $196.98 (.4%)
- these are emergency-only phones, Tracfones. currently 200 mins on each.
Cable & Internet: $1,320 (2.9%)
- needed for the land line
Electricity: $1,500 (3.3%)
Natural gas: $1,200 (2.7%)
- we live in a subzero climate
Water: $600 (1.3%)

Savings
Emergency fund: $1,200 (2.7%)
Retirement savings: $3,150.00 (7.0%)
- plus company matching
Car insurance: $1,514
Gasoline: $2,400
AAA membership: $52.00
- We have a 10 year old car, and a 2 year old car. No mass transit in our area
Oil changes, tire replacement, repair fund, parking, tolls, registrations: $1,600 (3.5%)

Food
Dining out: $120 (.3%)
Groceries: $3,600 (8%)
- hubby refuses to eat rice, corn, bread, or potatoes - only meat & veggies

Misc
Martial arts studio: $900 (2%)
- I have been doing it for years and this is sincerely one of the last things I will give up
At work fitness center: $120 (.3%)

Pets
Fea & heartworm medications: $304 (.7%)
Veterinary care plan: $478.80 (1.1%)
Food, treats, and toys: $660 (1.5%)
- hubby only wants organic, all natural food for dogs which is expensive
License fees: $24

Personal
My clothes: $200 (.4%)
- I work in a business environment and need business clothes like suits
Hubby's clothes: $150 (.3%)
Haircuts and personal items: $90 (.2%)
Movies, books, tickets, etc. $120 (.3%)
Wedding, birthday, holiday gifts: $180 (.4%)
Parties: $180 (.4%)

School tuition (after financial aid): $2,000 (4.4%)
Books and supplies: $300 (.7%)
Guaranteed parking on campus: $405 (.9%)

Church donations: $1,008 (2.2%)
Other donations: $744.00 (1.6%)

Health insurance: $1,396.46 (3.1%)
Dental insurance: $171.34 (.4%)
- no health problems, copays are paid out of a health spending account

Total: $49,025.66 ($4,025.66 over income)

HELP!
Wow, that's quite the budget! You must live in a really high cost-of-living city with property taxes at that rate. Our house was bought for $131,900 and the city's tax rate for this coming year is 5.3% or so. When our house was assessed in January 2008, it was done so at $297k and we paid $1387 per year for property taxes.

Ok enough about me, let's get going on your budget. :)

1) Can you claim a different tax status to get your income taxes lowered?
2) Can you refinance the mortgage at a lower rate? I'd check that out.
3) What about getting a better rate on your house insurance without changing deductible and coverage?
4) Can you defer the savings for house repairs for now, until you get things straightened out?
5) Can you find ways to cut back on electricity and natural gas usage? I live in a pretty cold climate too and we've cut our bill a good amount with a few changes.
6) I'd check on public transportation to cut costs with gas. Also call on a lower rate for your insurance.

Now, if your husband is refusing to eat certain things that are going to cost you less to feed him, and he's also refusing to get the job, I think it's your duty to either tell him to eat what you have or get a job. He may not be spending a lot of money, but he really is. By having you buy more expensive food, he's actually costing you more. That whole excuse has got to go! He's also requiring things that cost more for your pets, which means he's spending more.

I would seriously consider cutting out all unnecessary expenses for the time being. This includes donations to church because you need the money more than the church does. Unless the church is willing to foot your mortgage bill or help you keep a roof over your head, I'm sure God can wait for money. :D Search for ways to get to and from school and work that'll cut costs, carpool and even take public transit.

I would also put my foot down with DH about his stinginess with expenses and his inability to get a job. If he's living under the same roof, eating your food that you're paying for and demanding that you only give the dog organic things, he's not being respectful of either you or the financial situation you both are in. I'd make him sleep outside in the doghouse. :D
 

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I am looking at my income and outgo in 2009...and I am just not sure if I see how I can do this. I've been married for 2 years. Hubby is a college student and staunchly refuses to get a job even during breaks, saying "Why should I get a job, I don't spend that much."
What a crock. That's total bull.

Take the mortgage, utilities, food, phones, and anything else that benefits him. Add it all up. Divide it in two. Show him the total.

Then say, "YOU SPEND THIS MUCH EACH YEAR, JUST BREATHING. GET A JOB AND HELP ME OR YOU'RE GOING TO REGRET IT!"

Ok you *could*say it more gently than that if you want.

But the thing is he's used to mom and dad supporting him, and he's expecting you to do the same. Time for him to pay his own way.

Oh don't forget to add in the tuition and books! That's ALL HIM.
 

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Oh - and by the way - you yourself are doing an awesome job! That budget was one of the best presented ever! :D
 

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on your track phone. my dd has one ,to help on the Min's I got the 50 $ card that doubles your Min's for a year. so then you can get 200 Min's for the price of 100. 50 $ is a lot at the time but it pays for it self in no time. Or Track phone also has a new phone that is like 30$ and it comes with double Min's for life of the phone.
 

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Hi,

I'm in my lunchbreak and had some time to do the math.

If you divide all the costs above neatly by 2 (apart from your retirement savings, martial arts and gym) (and counting all school tuition costs towards DH completely), your DH spends 23,383.33 USD. If he thinks that's 'not that much', he should think again. I think the amount is even higher, because he insists on specialty food for himself and the pets, so maybe 3/4 of those budgets should be added to 'his' costs.
 

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Hi and welcome :)

I read this yesterday and wanted to type something then but decided to sit on my fingers till this morning.

Your hubby is spoiled and when he graduates, and looks for a job, they are going to want to see some work history. So if he does not have any, it won't look that good on the resume.

First off, I would stop making those donations. You need the money in your pocket more than where you are sending it now.

Maybe you can wiggle those utilities down some.

The dogs don't need top end $$ food. Try experimenting with some other brands.

Your food budget......I would cut them down and / or buy what you want to eat. The hubby can either go along with it, or start fending for himself.....like finding a part time job.

If you are giving him a allowance of any kind, then that needs to get cut out.
Just gas money to go to school for right now.

Your home insurance may be able to come down more. See if you can get a higher deductible if need be. Only what you are comfortable with though. Shop around with other insurance places for different quotes.

( Misc. home repairs $1,200 (2.7%)
- to go into a savings acct. No repairs appear to be on the horizon with the house.)
********I would keep this part of the budget going in. If house does not need anything now, the money could always be a emergency source of funds if something else comes up.

Hubby needs to find a job of some kind.If not, then he has no reason to ask for special things for himself. Cut back on whatever you can.
If you don't draw the line now, then when he graduates, you maybe still supporting him, and then he will get to sit home and watch TV, etc, while you are working. Please tell me, he does some things around the house now to help out.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Thank you for your suggestions everyone!

I hate cutting down on the charitable contributions because I already feel I'm not giving enough (I try to do 10% but it doesn't look like it will work out this year). I don't really see anything else I can cut. Maybe the cable & Internet, then I have to pay more for a land line though.

I can go lower on the quality of food for the dogs, but I think it cuts down on vet costs as the dogs age, plus you can actually feed dogs less food if it's higher quality. I would probably save more by not feeding them table scraps, LOL! Cutting out the work-gym would only cut $120 from the budget per year, and since I'm losing weight (30 pounds so far) by working out there, I think this is worthwhile...

Fortunately the budget will probably be tight only for this year, next year when DH graduates it should about double our income and things will be a lot easier...

DH is a nursing student, so they don't really care whether he has work experience or not, since they do clinical rounds during school. But I am with you, even an income from flipping burgers on the weekends would balance this budget. ($7.50 * 2 days per week * 8 hours per day * 52 weeks per year = $6240) Unfortunately, if he doesn't want to, then I will have to. I do not want to go into debt!

But I will definitely talk to him about it. Thanks for your input!
 

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A lot of the nursing students here work their way through nursing school by working as health care aids in nursing homes. It is great experience for nursing and the pay is better than flipping burgers. Here they make well over $10 an hour.

Your DH definitely needs to get a job. The fact that he is refusing to get a job to help out says a lot about his character and would make me nervous planning a lifetime with him.
 

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Dh needs to put on his big boy pants and get a job. Now when he graduates, will he even want to get a full time job? Or work just enough to buy HIS toys. His current attitude brings up red flags. Sounds like time to have a serious talk with him. Show him the numbers, point out where HE is increasing expenditures. Show him, that while he may not be out partying, buying stereos, etc, he IS spending, and you need help.

Refusing to eat lower costs food while not contributing to the income of the family unit, is irresponsible.

It won't hurt him to work. He does spend, he wants more expensive foods, organic for the dogs. I have issue with that one. I don't know what kind of dogs you have, but I feed my Bella a high end food, it' costs me under $10/mo. She is only 1 dog, and not that big, but she doesn't need organic food. I can't afford organic for US, so why would I do that for her? I know they are like kids, but it doesn't mean they get better or more than you can afford.

You're a kind hearted soul to want to donate more. But you have to do what you can for yourself, God gave you the abilities to do so, so do it.
 

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I used to babysit for a nursing student who worked part time as an EMT. So, there's that option for him too. She only worked a couple days a month, but made good money.
 

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cojo, glad that you are being open minded about our suggestions. It is really hard when you are in this type of relationship to see things from an outsider's point of view. since i have been in your shoes I really know how hard it is to be with someone like your husband. i really sincerely hope for you that he can see the error of his ways.
 
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