How do you spend Thanksgiving?
Will it be a frugal holiday for you?
You do not have to defend yourself. There’s nothing wrong with having a quiet Thanksgiving at home. Sounds like you may want to put a little distance between you and your sister’s family. I wish you the best. Do not get sucked into too much drama, there’s somethings you cannot control and it is not worth the hassle and stress. The only person that suffers is you. It sounds like your sister enjoys teetering on the edge of her financial instability and her husband sounds like a bully. Do your best to kill them with kindness and quietness and know that you are doing the best you can taking care of yourself and your mom.Have to defend myself for just staying home and staying out of the fighting...Can't even sit there quietly as the in-laws, sister's family, just start up and he has the kids joining in as some of the kids are taught today to verbally harass unwelcome adults (who are on disability check especially...) Kids/BIL are getting so threatening, I REFUSE to attend. Cannot talk back or he could harm me as he is doctor and these have been known to do psych holds on family to 'correct' misunderstanding...I've seen a LOT of females harmed in my community by METOO and mental care calling victims schizo plus predator white-collars like I listed, so I don't go ANYWHERE near a member of the medical profession ( plus cops, psych care, attorneys, social worker to name a few predator types) who doesn't act right...Family is small so cannot always stick to wing-man like glue as husband is spending some time at the jail for a while for something dumb so I'm alone with them good amount of time just visiting family.
Was easier to refuse living alone. But now living with aging parent so there's now two fights...
I still get to see sister & the kids when they drop by unannounced here and there when they want something (making $150k a year, mooching $35k parent still)... I wish that was enough but my Mother's always been the dominator no matter what and doesn't care about norms....She would never take NO for answer as child either...HATE being back to that as an adult. I stayed away for 20 years but then ran into my own employment problems living in another city so luck to have a roof over my head. Father's wasn't well anyway so didn't hurt to have me around during days.
Did my own crockpot turkey with some sides...Happy for this year... Want to move parent a little ways from BIL & sister to contain the mooching and threats... Then just take her to visit myself and ignore every threatening comment...Cause BIL can't do psych hold if I live in another county. Where we're currently staying had a rise in crime and bad policing, so many of the older ones are quietly just moving away...