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Discussion Starter #1
I know many forum members have SOs, spouses, or children at home, but I am a divorced empty-nester. I think a one-person household has some idiosyncrasies (some good, some bad) with regard to costs/frugality. Anybody else with similar circumstances?
 

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I'm with you. I've always lived alone except for a ten year detour into the convent that ended about 12 years ago. I love it, and would not trade my freedom and independence for anything. It helps not having to get anyone else "on board" -- but then there's also no one else to blame if we blow it!

For me, it is a huge incentive to save. I am very conscious that in an emergency -- job loss, illness, etc. -- it's just me. There's no second salary or someone else who could pick up at least a temporary job to help get past the crunch. I am going to pay off the last of the debt next month, and then, barring a crisis, watch me save! I think a substantial emergency fund is maybe even more essential for us.

Some costs are probably not so different -- we still have housing, utilities, insurance, etc. I can get by living in a small apartment which helps with utility costs, but these are not easy costs to trim. At least we eat less than a family of four!

There are probably many other aspects I haven't thought much about. I would be interested in hearing from others. This is a good kith. So much we see is for families; a lot of it is, of course, adaptable, but our situation really is different.
 

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I was for 3 years until my dad moved back up here & now he lives with me & there are times when I miss having my house to myself but then I'm happy he's here because I grew up without him in my life & we get along quite well it's just I am a very quiet person and at times I just want to be by myself.
 

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I'm with you also. I'm recently divorced and I love living alone again. I like the fact that if I'm not hungry I don't have to cook something anyway or if I don't feel like cleaning today, I can do it the next day. I am making some radical changes so that I can save for my future and pay off my credit card bills. Like dcompton said, if something happens, it's just me, so I need to get these cards paid off and move on to saving, saving, saving!
 

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I've lived alone since I moved out...about five years now. Although I do hope to get married and have children, I too enjoy the freedom that comes with living alone. If I want it quiet, I can lay on my bed with all the lights turned off and soak up the silence. If I want it loud, I can crank my music and dance to my heart's content (with the blinds drawn, of course ;)). I agree that living alone produces some unique circumstances with regards to frugality...the most glaring (to me, anyway) being that I can't blame anyone else! If too much money is being spent on groceries, it is MY fault, no one else's, and it is ME who has to change. Although this does help focus me on self-improvement, it also makes it difficult to enjoy my guilty pleasures (like buying used books online), since I know I'm going to have to go without somewhere else to compensate.
 

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Edna - I'm an empty nester, single, with 2 children in college. While I enjoy some of the aspects of living alone I'm finding that my life was caring for my kids. Sometimes it's hard being on my own without having that significant other to share hopes and dreams with.

The one thing I do love is not having to cook a big meal when I get home from work! When the kids are home we cook big like I used to and I really enjoy this.

I also know that I have to take care of myself and that can be overwhelming at times. Money is always an issue and I worry about being able to take care of myself. And yes there is no one else to blame but me when I overspend! I can see the importance of a good emergency fund now more than before.

I've started baking on Sundays, trying a new bread recipie every week. I'm also doing some home improvements like painting and reorganizing things, I want to make my home my own. A garden plan is in the works for this spring.

I also have some health issues like perimenopause that I'm dealing with, but I read recently that this should be a time of rebirth and I like that idea. I'm trying to realize that this can be a time of possibilities for me.

Thanks for starting this thread. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #7
Mary, you sound a LOT like me. I also feel the lack of someone to share with, and am increasingly aware of my lack of emergency fund (it seems like every time I gather one, the car eats it for a repair). I like your Sunday baking idea, and I also am trying to plan a garden this year.

My primary difficulty with many frugal suggestions is that they seem to be based on large quantities. I buy large quantities of things that keep for a long time, like toilet paper, but foods in large quantities tend to go to waste.

Anybody got any favorite recipes for 4 (or fewer) servings?
 

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I dont know if I qualify...Its just me. I dont live alone(still with my mom till August) but I'm the only person my $ affects. Its just me when it comes to my $. I have no kids, and I'm not married.
 

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I am, and I find it so hard to cook for one! I have tried the "freeze and save" method, but I get tired of eating the same stuff, and it goes bad in the freezer. Now I sort of shop day by day, and it's hard to budget like that.
 

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I'm also in this category of living alone. My husband died several years ago and my three kids are grown and on their own so I've been 'on my own' for about five years now. I spent such a large part of my life raising children and doing for others that I'm enjoying my freedom. I'm a school Librarian so I get to keep contact with children but then I come home to blissful peace. I love my new lifestyle.
 

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I, too, live alone (except for 3 dogs and a cat) and in a house WAY too large for a single person. Being a very "green", environmentally conscientious person, I often feel guilty about having SO much space to myself. Fortunately it's a stone home that's very energy efficient, and I do work from my home, so that does lessen the guilt a bit. It also makes me feel guilty when I think of my business partners overseas, in India, and the way they live in such a close, family community, sharing all, while I (almost selfishly) live alone in my big house. I don't only live alone, I'm also a bit of a social loner, only having one close friend...and she finds me quite eccentric but understands my eccentricities well. My partner of four years, my one true love, recently died, the very day after we had decided to make ours a permanent relationship, and he, too, was a social loner type. We had planned on being married but keeping separate homes. Very strange, I know. He also lived in a large (his, actually huge) house alone. I suppose we both couldn't stand the idea of changing our ways, though we couldn't think of living without one another...or living with one another. Hard to think of moving on, since he and I were such a perfect match...and so I'll probably remain a loner. Ah well, I'm happy, and I can always adopt another dog.
 

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i live alone too (with my 2 furbabies) at times i like it but here lately ive been so lonely (glad to have fv!)
i hope to remarry someday or at least find a companion. i always seem to have chosen loser guys and now there doesn't seem to be ways to meet anyone as i get older.
other than my lonely spells, i make pretty good company LOL i always get to watch what i want on tv and if i feel like spending the whole day on the computer (which i do frequently) there is no one to complain about it. :)
 

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Moontidearts---I'm so very sorry about your partner. What a tragic loss, finding your one true love, and the day after you committed yourselves to each other!

I hope the healing has begun or begins soon.
 

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I am 51 years old and have been married twice for a total of less than 2 years. So almost all of my life has been that of a single person. I am hardly EVER lonely. It just doesn't bother me to be alone. I don't even think about it.

I have lived alone since my daughter left the nest about 10 years ago. I prefer living by myself. I have no one to account to except myself. I don't want to deal with another man's baggage or take one on to support. I think I've just gotten burned out and dumped on 1 too many times. I know that I can take care of myself and provide a comfortable life for myself. So why would I want to put up with the crap another man could possibly bring into my life?

I said a prayer years ago. . .I told God that if he wanted me to be married, please send the man to me and make it VERY clear that he was the one. . .and if he didn't want me to be married, that was okay too. I felt very content after that prayer. I stopped looking and started living. If it's meant to be. . it will be. . .if it's not. . .life goes on.
 

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Discussion Starter #15
Me too!

... but here lately ive been so lonely (glad to have fv!) ... :)
Maybe it's the weather or something. Actually, I've been attributing mine to stress, but if it isn't just me, weather seems a more likely factor. Usually, I'm quite happy living alone. I'm kind of like Droppedonmyhead (LOVE that name!) about believeing that if God wants me to share my life, he'll present me with the one to share it with - though by now he'd probably have to knock me up the side of the head pretty hard to get my attention and say "Hey! This is the one!"

PM me if you want to exchange phone numbers. I work normal business hours, but am almost always available for an evening chat.
 

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Single here too and have been all my life. I like that it allows me to be very urban and not own a car, but the food problem is a common one. I only have a small freezer so I try and plan out meals that freeze well and eat them over a couple weeks. I might make two or three family sized meals and then eat them for lunch and/or dinner for a week. It does get boring. The only way to really get variety often seems to be convienence or deli foods but that gets expensive.

Donna, if it's not to personal, what community where you in? I have thought about giving it a try myself, but my parents are not well and non-catholic to boot so it has never panned out.

Christine
 

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you guys are so sweet (i love my fv peoples) food to think about--im not sure its the weather yet--i do get that seasonal depression. i did payroll yesterday morning and realized that other than coming in on sunday for a few hrs to get a headstart on payroll i had only worked 4.4hrs in a 2wk period. and the rest of the time i was sitting at home hoping they would call me in (i work @a hospital and if the census is too low i get called off) i work 7 on and 7 off so every one of my 7 days i got called off :( i think maybe not being around ppl was part of it. i had a good time yesterday and got to stay the whole shift.
dropped i like your prayer (and like edna God needs to slap me up side the head - i never know when someone good comes along) i think i'll try this prayer and see if it gives me a little peace - i've just always thought that God didn't mean for to be alone all my life. i've had some sick spells a couple of times here lately (vomiting late at night) and it's scared me being alone. also my neighbors have decided to go crazy and the cops have been over there a couple of times. sorry about the long post -- you guys made me feel brighter this morning :hugz:
 

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Moonti...I have the same guilt about my house, and it's not even very large, but it is 3 bedrooms. When I moved here, I still had my youngest at home, but I've been alone here for a long time. Everyone says I should get a roommate, but I really don't want one.

I think "eccentric" is a kind word for what everyone calls me...WEIRD! I have gotten to be a hermit of sorts. I don't like having people over, and everyone knows not to come unless they are invited. Uninvited visitors are relegated to standing on the front porch.

I'd be much worse if I didn't work outside my home, I'm sure.
 

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I thought the other posts were all very interesting. All I ever wanted in life in my younger years was to be married and have a family. Well. . I did those things, just not in the manner that I thought I would.

I didn't even change my last name when I got divorced years ago because I thought I would be remarried and why have to change it AGAIN. THAT WAS 28 YEARS AGO!!!! It never occurred to me that I wouldn't have a husband. Well. . .SURPRISE!!!!

One thing is for certain. Typically, men pass on before women and we women will be left alone. My heart has bled for my dear friends who lost their husbands and were suddenly alone. It was so difficult for them.

I think we have to learn to be content with whatever our lives are at any given time. And we have to learn to be self-sufficient. I know that it can be scary at times. . such as when someone's outside ringing my doorbell at 2 a.m. (that's what 911 is there for). . .or when I'm so sick and no one is there to care for me. . .(keep your medicine, water and the phone on your nightstand). . .there is always a solution to any fear we might have.
 

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I'm also single, and I face the same problem with food/cooking. I live in an apartment with a very small freezer, so I can't stock up on huge amounts of sale/discount items. And when I buy fresh ingredients, it always seems like a lot goes bad before I can use it. Honestly, it doesn't seem like I save very much eating at home rather than getting cheap takeout (which I do a lot of, but really would like to cut back).

An added problem is that I work *long* hours, often getting home at 9 or 10 pm, so it's not unusual for me to be eating both lunch and dinner at work, where there are very limited food preparation facilities. I suppose if I get myself super-organized I could cook ahead for a week on Saturday or Sunday, but it's a challenge given that I'm not a very talented cook. I'm hoping to find some good ideas here!
 
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