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3,852 Posts
I find it so sad that people don't get it!
I have a friend who is potentially going bankrupt. Her hubby makes $60/hr, they have a dinky rundown house, rundown because they can't afford to fix it up.
They can't rub 2 pennies together. She said it's because of their son, his meds are $340/mo. HUH? She just finished saying they have 100% prescription coverage, so at best is $5 per scrip they pay.
But she can't get rid of satellite - the kids NEED it. $90/mo
She needs the best internet - $90/mo
Iphone + black berry - $250/m0
Dance for dd - $220/mo
Dance competition fees - $100/mo average
Scrapbooking(she signed up for Stampin up for the discount, won't sell it) $400/3mo.
Brand new van - $450/2week
Gel nails - $60/3weeks
She showed up at my door stressed about money. We make less than 1/2 of what they do. So, there isn't alot of hand holding.
She asked what would I do. So I did. She didn't like it. Maybe I shouldn't have but I told her what I'd do, get rid of satellite, and use netflix. She whined then she won't get to watch her shows. HUH? She just finished saying there was nothing on anyway and netflix has lots the kids and her haven't seen. I'd down to basic internet, get rid of the data packages on the phones, but her hubby signed a contract on the blackberry. She said she needs the iphone for scheduling purposes, told her a $10 day timer would work just as well. Sell the van, get a used one. Discontinue the stampin up and nails... got a big whine on it(but it's the only thing I do for ME!it isn't that much). I suggest community dance instead of the competitive dance. She started to cry. I asked what is the issue with that, because her daughter would never get to compete if she left now. I asked her what is she going to do with dance? It's not a life long career, they are lucky to get 10 years, and very few are able to make it. She said it was because she hates to say they cant afford it, that she was told no alot when she was growing up(raised by single mom, who now has multiple properties that support her in retirement due to smart money management). Smoking - get on board to quit(she's talked about that the whole time I've known her).
She went to social services this month to get grocery vouchers and pay her utilities...
I laid it out for her.
If:
Cancelled satellite and use net flix - savings $82
Down grade to basic high speed - savings $30
Get rid of Iphone - Savings $125
Move to community league dance program - Savings $290
Drop Stampin up - savings $400/3 mo or $133 per mo.
Sell Van - Savings $900/mo + price of sale
Go to home manicure no Gel - Savings $60+ per month.
Limit take out to 1x per mo- savings $60/wk-$240
Total savings - $1860
BUt she said that is too hard. That $1860 would allow them to pay everything monthly, keep their loans from default, and put $300/mo in savings. (she's currently short $1500/mo).
BUT IT'S TOO HARD????wtf.
I don't judge we've had our own hardships and stupid moments, but we've learned! We have an EF now. I work with in a budget. I've learned how to save! Using coupons and sales, I dropped my grocery/h&B/home care from $1000 to $400-$500 since May. My kids are earning money, they have a flyer route. It's not alot of money, but they are earning it. DD14 is mowing lawns for a couple people for some money. DS is paying some of his own things. He buys his bus pass. While he's working he pays his cell phone($25). He buys his own snacks for munching.
Oh that is another things, there is a flyer route available in her area, no way will she consider it. It's beneath her. It would be a way for 2 of her kids to earn a little spending money. She has a 12yo that would be capable of earning money cutting neighbors lawns. But again, no, cause what would the neighbors think? That he is motivated, helpful and using some ingenuity to make his own money?
I didn't honey coat it. I told her how it was(she's that way with everyone else, so I thought I might get through to her that way). She didn't care to hear it. She cried that she just wished her son was normal then they wouldn't have these issues(he is adhd, odd - a handful, but it could be far far worse). But his meds aren't the problem, it's a scapegoat. I don't know if I should have said anything, but she asked. I haven't heard from her in awhile, she's stewing..lol. Maybe something will 'click'.
I have a friend who is potentially going bankrupt. Her hubby makes $60/hr, they have a dinky rundown house, rundown because they can't afford to fix it up.
They can't rub 2 pennies together. She said it's because of their son, his meds are $340/mo. HUH? She just finished saying they have 100% prescription coverage, so at best is $5 per scrip they pay.
But she can't get rid of satellite - the kids NEED it. $90/mo
She needs the best internet - $90/mo
Iphone + black berry - $250/m0
Dance for dd - $220/mo
Dance competition fees - $100/mo average
Scrapbooking(she signed up for Stampin up for the discount, won't sell it) $400/3mo.
Brand new van - $450/2week
Gel nails - $60/3weeks
She showed up at my door stressed about money. We make less than 1/2 of what they do. So, there isn't alot of hand holding.
She asked what would I do. So I did. She didn't like it. Maybe I shouldn't have but I told her what I'd do, get rid of satellite, and use netflix. She whined then she won't get to watch her shows. HUH? She just finished saying there was nothing on anyway and netflix has lots the kids and her haven't seen. I'd down to basic internet, get rid of the data packages on the phones, but her hubby signed a contract on the blackberry. She said she needs the iphone for scheduling purposes, told her a $10 day timer would work just as well. Sell the van, get a used one. Discontinue the stampin up and nails... got a big whine on it(but it's the only thing I do for ME!it isn't that much). I suggest community dance instead of the competitive dance. She started to cry. I asked what is the issue with that, because her daughter would never get to compete if she left now. I asked her what is she going to do with dance? It's not a life long career, they are lucky to get 10 years, and very few are able to make it. She said it was because she hates to say they cant afford it, that she was told no alot when she was growing up(raised by single mom, who now has multiple properties that support her in retirement due to smart money management). Smoking - get on board to quit(she's talked about that the whole time I've known her).
She went to social services this month to get grocery vouchers and pay her utilities...
I laid it out for her.
If:
Cancelled satellite and use net flix - savings $82
Down grade to basic high speed - savings $30
Get rid of Iphone - Savings $125
Move to community league dance program - Savings $290
Drop Stampin up - savings $400/3 mo or $133 per mo.
Sell Van - Savings $900/mo + price of sale
Go to home manicure no Gel - Savings $60+ per month.
Limit take out to 1x per mo- savings $60/wk-$240
Total savings - $1860
BUt she said that is too hard. That $1860 would allow them to pay everything monthly, keep their loans from default, and put $300/mo in savings. (she's currently short $1500/mo).
BUT IT'S TOO HARD????wtf.
I don't judge we've had our own hardships and stupid moments, but we've learned! We have an EF now. I work with in a budget. I've learned how to save! Using coupons and sales, I dropped my grocery/h&B/home care from $1000 to $400-$500 since May. My kids are earning money, they have a flyer route. It's not alot of money, but they are earning it. DD14 is mowing lawns for a couple people for some money. DS is paying some of his own things. He buys his bus pass. While he's working he pays his cell phone($25). He buys his own snacks for munching.
Oh that is another things, there is a flyer route available in her area, no way will she consider it. It's beneath her. It would be a way for 2 of her kids to earn a little spending money. She has a 12yo that would be capable of earning money cutting neighbors lawns. But again, no, cause what would the neighbors think? That he is motivated, helpful and using some ingenuity to make his own money?
I didn't honey coat it. I told her how it was(she's that way with everyone else, so I thought I might get through to her that way). She didn't care to hear it. She cried that she just wished her son was normal then they wouldn't have these issues(he is adhd, odd - a handful, but it could be far far worse). But his meds aren't the problem, it's a scapegoat. I don't know if I should have said anything, but she asked. I haven't heard from her in awhile, she's stewing..lol. Maybe something will 'click'.
