Frugal Village Forums banner

1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
23,290 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Having moved to a small town, I've found there are a few "gossips" and most people know your business before you even do.

One of these "gossips" called the other night while I was out walking, wanting to see my quilts. She had heard through the "grapevine" that I quilted.

This "gossip" has caused numerous problems for many of the local people (she is an elderly lady), spreads rumors that aren't true, gossips about you, the inside of your home, your kids, you name it!! Michael alone would give her enough "gossip" for years to come. :eek:

I haven't called her back and don't plan too, but should she call me back, I have a dilemna.

What would you do?

- would you show her your quilts in your home?
- would you suggest you take your quilts to her home?
- would you give her some excuse for not showing them?
- OR?????
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
33,846 Posts
CJ, I would take the quilts to her home BUT ONLY if she is really interested in purchasing them, she could just want to see them so she can run her mouth. OR find an excuse for not showing them to her at all.

I lived in a town like that before, and heaven forbid you have done ANYTHING out of the ordinary.

Oh and to shut her up about Michael, tell her unless she's God, she has NO RIGHT to JUDGE!! God sent this beautiful child for a reason, and the reason is NOT for her to judge.

I say humble her. Good luck and let us know what you deceide to do.
Love & Hugs
 

·
Founder
Joined
·
19,054 Posts
Maybe she needs a dear friend. When you mentioned she was elderly, I first thought maybe she was lonely and that was the root of her gossiping.

Having seen some of your quilts, I'd be proud to show them to anyone. Judging by your post, it seems you are apprehensive on what she may say about you afterwards, BUT what would it truly matter even if she did kwim? Anyone that knows you well enough would know better and anyone that knows her at all would already know she was gossipy.

If you are anything like me, inviting someone to your home is a private thing. I don't invite just anyone over. Do you have an outside area for sitting? Maybe once nice weather hits, you could have her by, but an outside get together. You could really have a nice get together without feeling it was quite as intrusive.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
14,689 Posts
CJ I live in a small town too and the very same lady lives here, or her twin sister does! I've learned over the years that I can't control what she says about me and mine and that most everyone in town ignores the things that she says anyway. If she were to call me I would show her my quilts either in my home or in her's whichever you'd prefer. I'd kill her with kindness and if she had any questions about myself or my children I'd answer them, honestly and in a very "un-defensive" style. I'm sure that she's a miserable person, needing someone to care for her, truly care-which is what the lady here needs. I've found that being kind to her it makes me feel better and not really care what she says. I hope you work it out in a way that you're comfortable with.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
23,290 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Sara, you said "inviting someone into your home is a very private thing" BINGO!!!

My home is my private area too, and I am very cautious as to who I invite in. I've always been like that and yet I do enjoy having some people in my home. I also struggle with anyone "gossiping" about my kids!!!! The mommy bear comes out in me and although I know most people here would take it with a grain of salt, it would really irk me.

Your suggestion about meeting outside though is a wonderful suggestion. The weather is warm enough to do just that. If she calls again, I will do just that I think or I will bring them to her house.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,196 Posts
Cj, I was going to say that I would have made up an excuse, because I dont have time for people who are not sincere, I just dont give them the time of day.

THEN, I read Sara's post and I became rather ashamed of myself, THEN, Lisa and Carolyn's posts and decided that I need to work hardeat being kind to my "Enemies"

If you can show her your quilts, I am proud of you, if you cant, I understand.

Glad to be among ladies of such high moral value, you all keep me on the right path.
 

·
Heather Bob
Joined
·
7,312 Posts
You have got some wonderful advice, I agree with the outside visit over lemonade! AND with inviting someone into your home being a private thing, we have some people in our village that act the same way, the summer after we moved my front door was a revolving door, I've never had so many people drop by....it seems to have slowed down considerably after the first look.....lol!!

This thread reminds me of a quote I once read, it goes something like this...."Live your life in such a way that if someone says something bad about you no one will believe them anyway!!" I try to remember that all the time, my feelings get hurt very easily!:sigh:

And a big :thumb: to Robin for her honesty!!:hugz:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,790 Posts
CJ, I think that it would be an honor for her to see your quilts. I agree with the others in saying that treating her with kindness is the best option. I would offer to drop by her house and show them to her.

Who knows, she maybe a quilter too and since she is an elderly lady she may have lots of knowledge and stories to tell. This could be the beginning of a great friendship.:D
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8,337 Posts
I say kick her in the butt !!!!!!! Just kidding......................

One way or another she will talk about whom ever she wants if it is true or not, show her what a wonderful generous lady you are and if she says something ill of you it's her sin, most people consider the source when they hear gossip......
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,215 Posts
I agree with these ladies. Show them to her, but not in your house if you aren't comfortable.
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top