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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I found out yesterday that my ex boyfriend is getting married to an old friend. Am I out of place sending a wedding gift?

The ex and I were together 5 years and when he didn't propose I moved on. We parted on amicable, if strained terms. He wasn't happy, but then he'd had his chance and then some. I've seen him a couple times since I married (12 years ago)but he has stayed understandably distant.

The friend I don't see much any more since she moved out of state, maybe once a year.

The 3 of us are on a mailing list of college buddies, which is how I found out about it. I sent a congratulatory email. I don't expect to be invited to the ceremony, but I do wish them well. I would like to send a gift (probably a gift card, as they are both adult householders) but I am wondering if I should just butt out.

What would you do?
 

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no, absolutely not.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Ok, thanks for the reality check. I guess I will butt out.
 
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Unless I was invited to the wedding, I wouldn't send a gift.
 
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I wouldn't send a gift (since it seems too intrusive) but I don't think sending a card to "Mr and Mrs X" after the wedding saying congratulations would be out of line.
 

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I think the email was enough. Not that a gift would be intrusive, but I just don't feel it's necessary.
 

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You've already sent a congratulatory email. I'd leave it at that. If you really feel compelled to send something, a card would be it. No gift card, no gift. Just a card.

The stars clearly show you're not meant to be 'friends' (right now?) otherwise you'd all be reaching out and in touch with each other directly. (no offense)
 

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No I wouldn't unless invited to wedding.
 

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I would if I were invited. If not invited, no gift.
 
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